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May 30, 2005

OK, so apparently you do bite the hand that feeds

Hey, so it turns out Trent Reznor is a liberal! Good for him. We discover this crucial fact because Nine Inch Nails wanted to perform "The Hand That Feeds" at the MTV Movie Awards in front of an image of George Bush. Given that the Los Angeles Times described the song as "a warning against blind acceptance of authority," MTV said thanks but no thanks.

So now the sparks fly: the band is upset, they're quitting the show, and woe to those who underestimate the online petition. While Trent did get off a good line, "Apparently, the image of our president is as offensive to MTV as it is to me," he's either doing this for publicity or, amusingly enough, he's biting the hand that feeds.

In this politically charged climate, I think it's important to remember that politics is inherently divisive, and pretty much everything else in life seeks to bring us together. The MTV Music Awards are a great example: everyone loves music, everyone loves movies, everyone loves to have a good time. The minute you start telling people they're better or worse for supporting a candidate or ideology, you're splitting up your fanbase. Sorry Trent, you have Republican fans.

You could still argue that it's Nine Inch Nails' performance and they should be allowed to perform how they want anyway, but then again, it's an MTV-produced show on MTV programming. So given that it's a gray area, kudos to MTV for putting its foot down. Nine Inch Nails can attribute its success to a music industry so conditioned to help stars rise, and by attempting a with-us-or-against-us strategy among their own fans, they really are biting the hand that feeds. Didn't they pay attention to their own song? Lest anyone think I'm a closet conservative here, the same thing happened last year when Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon were planning to go up to the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown for a 15th-anniversary celebration of Bull Durham. Unfortunately, Hall of Fame president and HoFer at life Dale Petrosky banned the two from showing up on account of how unbelievably liberal they both are. It's a dumb move no matter what party's being attacked. If you're in a public setting for apolitical reasons, give it some real good thought before you force your fans and observers to make unreasonable and unrelated choices if they want to be with you. Does anyone think that's really what America is about?

Book Report: Deadlines Past: Forty Years of Presidential Campaigning: A Reporter's Story

I have a bias against reporters. In my professional life to date, I have run into some of the most talented and dedicated reporters I could imagine: people who fact-checked, held your feet to the fire and ultimately gave you a fair shot. People like those are a tribute to the profession and the freedoms they're afforded in the Constitution. Those are folks I like.

Then there's everybody else. The conduct of reporters on my last two campaigns have often left me genuinely appalled. I've written before on the blog about how uninformed reporters can be, even as they spout off on news-talk shows with utter confidence in their simply incorrect beliefs. What's truly stunning, though, is how many of them never even try. Last year in Kentucky, what I saw really confirmed the stereotype of political reporters: a lot of the news organizations (mostly TV) just never showed up if you were holding a substantive event like a jobs plan, and if they did show up, all their questions were on process and attack politics. Show a whiff of scandal, on the other hand, and they're on you like bias on Fox News. (I'm thinking specifically of the time I got one of our policy positions wrong on a questionnaire. I had to go on TV and get out of it the day after we did our health care launch and nobody came.) True, the local print and NPR reporters were generally great, but I have ten stories just like that about the extent to which the press misuses the public trust.

It's not much better on the national scene, either. I remember seeing the coverage of some Democratic debate around October 2003, and I was wondering why the pundits in the studio kept talking as if they knew so much less than I did. Granted, I was basically poring over the news as my job, but in a few months I found out whence my superior knowledge: a lot of reporters just didn't do the job. In the throes of Iowa caucus season, there were Hotline-ish insider-journalism stories detailing how hilarious it was that national reporters stayed in the Hotel Fort Des Moines lobby, because it was just too darned cold to go outside. Because of this attitude, all they did was ask each other about the hot rumors du jour while the actual campaign raged (and changed dramatically) in towns just a half-hour from the city. How they can keep their jobs after that kind of abandonment is beyond me.

So I'm not that inclined to love the professionalism of journalism. It's funny, actually, I think journalists and political operatives both tend to think of the other as having an inferior job. Journalists think of themselves as seeking the truth while campaign staffers seek to obscure it, and campaign operatives think of themselves as trying to change the world while journalists lamely sit and watch. It's not necessarily a healthy relationship. In truth it's the person, not the job, who's good or bad, but in weaker moments this is what gets brought up during fights.

So when I see the title of Walter Mears' Deadlines Past: Forty Years of Campaigning: A Reporter's Story, I snicker, "Who cares about a reporter's story? All they can do is talk about somebody else." This is true: thankfully, Mears writes about his impressions of the eleven presidential campaigns he's covered, and keeps the Walter Mears discussion to a few casual asides. Still, journalists' memoirs are usually not that great. It's admirable that a reporter give us just the facts in a news story, but that same trait tends to make their memoirs inconsequential. I read the autobiography of notably well connected sports journalist Dick Schaap a while ago, and Schaap never really gives you a compelling reason to care about the book. He just piles on the anecdotes and hopes the reader doesn't mind. With Mears, the same is true: if you care about politics, you'll relish the trip down memory lane with someone who was paying better attention than you were. If you're not interested in the minutiae, you won't find a whole lot that's compelling. At least Schaap's book had a conclusion; here's the last paragraph of Mears:


With that final story it was time for me to go. I'd had a front row seat on national politics for forty years. It was exhilarating, exhausting, satisfying, tense, frustrating, and fun - my ticket to see, hear, and write about winners and losers, flaws and failings, in the imperfect American way of nominating and electing presidents.

Really? That's it? Given that that paragraph could just have easily appeared on the inside front jacket, Mears apparently had no interest in taking the reader anywhere except through his old notebooks. When your ending reeks of "Honey, I'm done with the book, but I have no idea what to put at the end," it's worth revisiting why you're writing in the first place.

So it is what it is: the ebb and flow of the careers of other people. I personally like this stuff, so I enjoyed reading it, but I can't imagine anyone uninterested in politics being glad they read it. Even the structure is a little off-putting; devoting a chapter to each election probably makes the most sense, but it leaves important stories without a natural setting. (Where do you put Watergate? With McGoverrn or Carter?) Essentially, this is the political version of watching someone else's slides from Bermuda: you know a little more about what the trip was like, but in the back of your mind you're not sure what was the point.

Still, Mears isn't a bad guy. He freely admits that reporters always think they could do a better job than the candidates they cover, yet the journalists who run themselves rarely justify the assumption. While you can tell, more or less, that Mears is a Democrat, he never says so explicitly and gives a pretty fair shake to all the candidates. In fact, he helped cure me of one of my biggest complaints about reporters, namely the rank hypocrisy. A reporter asking a candidate why he's stonewalling on releasing potentially damaging documents will turn around two weeks later and ask him why he released such damaging documents. There are, of course, still jerks in reporting, and I don't mean to absolve those idiot columnists whose sage advice contradicts itself from week to week. Still, Mears offers a much better sense of the journalistic mentality. The questions sound accusatory because they have to provoke to get an answer. The journalist usually neither knows nor cares what the answers are, but it's his job to get an answer, and that's all he wants. In retrospect it should have been obvious, but now it'll be much easier for me to exclude journalists from those who have to be responsible enough to be consistent. They have a job to do, nothing else.

Unfortunately, Mears is still prone to making the same mistakes as most reporters. Like all national journalists, Mears has an annoying tendency to make blunt statements, the real story he couldn't tell you in the papers, even though he's usually wrong. When it's someone like Humphrey, I have no way to judge for myself, but I do know a fair amount about Bill Clinton's presidency, so there the errors and assumptions became annoying. Further, he has the annoying journalistic habit of focusing more on new material than on importance. Say you're a candidate who unveils a health care plan, and goes on the road to support it. Most reporters these days will report on the substance of the first health care event, and spend subsequent events waiting for the candidate to do something different. I suspect this mentality comes from two sources. First, there aren't many forms of competition between news organizations, so they're all driven to find new material and get it out first. Second, I'm pretty sure they teach you early in journalism school that "dog bites man" isn't a story, and "man bites dog" is a story. So if a candidate says something a little wild in a post-health care event press conference, that becomes the story, and any readers who don't know about the candidate's health care plan find out exactly nothing. This is why I wish journalists would consider "dog bites man" a story if the man, the dog, or the bite were important enough. In any event, Mears isn't doing himself any favors by assuming this is acceptable behavior.

So, in the interest of journalistic fairness, I'll conclude with one useful correction and one amusing anecdote. First, the correction: Mears says "While Dole was trying to transform himself, Clinton already had, adopting an old-fashioned strategy with a newfangled name: triangulation. ... Triangulation meant blaming the Republicans on the right when things went wrong, scorning Democrats on the left, planting Clinton back in the middle."

Triangulation was not old-fashioned, it certainly wasn't a blunt centrism, and it was more policy than politics. Back in reality, triangulation is the process of solving the other side's problems with your side's solutions to convey a sense of effectiveness and bipartisanship. The best example for Clinton is probably crime: Republicans had railed about liberals being weak on crime for years, without much in the way of a Democratic response. Clinton became the first national Democrat to focus on crime as a problem, but instead of the standard Republican solution (tougher sentences) he went with a more Democratic solution (more cops on the street). Clinton's triangulation appealed to liberals because he was using the power of government for good, to conservatives because he was solving one of their pet peeves, and to moderates because he looked like he was abandoning politics for the good of the country. And it's not just Clinton who did this: when George W. Bush decided to take on education by emphasizing accountability, that's triangulation too. He took a Democratic problem and solved it (I know, but bear with me here) and he used a Republican strategy. Sure, blunt centrism is easier to get your head around, but triangulation isn't that hard to understand either. I don't know why reporters don't get this.

So here's my favorite anecdote from the book:


While Goldwater campaigned by chartered jet, sometimes taking the controls himself against federal aviation rules, his running mate, a little-noted congressman named William E. Miller, traveled by turbo-prop, which took longer and gave him more time to play cards. Goldwater said he picked Miller, an upstate New York representative who had been party chairman, because the man drove Johnson nuts. That wasn't the case in 1964, when the LBJ Democrats welcomed the nomination of a candidate so anonymous then and later that he wound up appearing in American Express commercials about the power of the card even in the hands of the obscure.

The Miller campaign became a nonstop card game. The plane would taxi to a stop and he'd tell the aides and reporters in the game to put the cards down while he went to make his speech. When he got back they would pick up the hands and resume the game. One stop was in Phoenix, where he met with Goldwater at the airport, returned to the cards, and said, "Poor guy thinks he's going to win." Late in the campaign, a reporter offered him long odds on a bet for the Republican ticket. "I may be a gambler, but I'm not crazy enough to bet on this election," Miller said.


So if you're looking for stories like these, and you don't mind an RNC chair being referred to as anonymous, Walter Mears is your man. If you're looking for solid, accurate, insightful and good-looking commentary, stick with me.

Photo of the Day

To follow up on the previous post, here's a photo you like to see: Terry Francona taking David Wells out in the ninth inning, a return to form for a pitcher who'd been going a lot less than nine innings these days. Great stuff.

More External Verification

Avid Terry fans have known for some time that I can usually convince someone that Yankees shortstop, captain, and intangibles leader Derek Jeter is a shithead in the span of one randomly selected at-bat. Recently, I've taken to noticing that Jeter overreacts to pitches to try to sway the ump's call: if the ball's on the outside corner, Jeter leans forward, as if the ball were so outside he's just about to fall right over. Similarly, if the ball's on the inside corner of the plate, Jeter stumbles back as if the damn thing almost hit him.

Turns out I'm not the only one who feels this way. ESPN's story on the Sox' 7-2 win over the Yankees last night carries this gem:


Derek Jeter is still serving as live target practice.

The shortstop was hit by Matt Clement on Saturday, making it three times he's been beaned by Red Sox pitchers this year. Jeter isn't alone, though: the Yankees have been hit by the Sox 32 times since 2004 and 14 times since the start of the American League Championship Series.

Conversely, the Yankees have retaliated on just five occasions since last October.

Jeter doesn't think he's been deliberately thrown at, but refutes the notion that he invites trouble by leaning over the plate.

"I don't dive, I don't lean over the plate. I just get hit a lot," Jeter said. "It's nothing that I'm doing wrong. If I get hit, it's on the pitcher, not me."

The Yankees don't entirely agree.

"Derek puts himself in a position where he can't get out of the way," said Bernie Williams. "He commits himself too much, and he can't get out."

Regardless of who's at fault, Jeter's teammates wonder how many more beanings he can endure before he's seriously injured.

"I worry about his hands. I worry about broken bones," said catcher John Flaherty.


C'mon ump! That was almost a wild pitch!

Seriously, though, misleading officials and sulking are intangibles that win you ballgames.

For the record

Certain members of the family edged close to dork patrol this weekend when they suggested that caramel and butterscotch are the same thing. Discerning tastes know otherwise, but here's proof! sort of:


Question:
Can anyone tell me the difference between butterscotch and caramel?

Answers:
The flavor of butterscotch is a blend of butter and brown sugar.
Caramel is a mixture produced when granulated sugar has been cooked (caramelized) until it melts and becomes a thick, clear liquid that can range in color from golden to deep brown. A soft caramel is a candy made with a caramelized sugar, butter, and milk.


That's what you get when you question my culinary talents. Also, here's a link to a list of Torani flavored syrups, the first food item I ever noticed that had different flavors for butterscotch and caramel. This is important.

Stop acting so shocked

See, I drive fine, if you take things into context. I noticed when I went to college that everyone says people drive crazy in their hometown, as if it's a point of pride. "Oh man, you're going to have to get used to these Philly drivers then." "This is bad, but man, it's nowhere near as bad as it is in New Jersey." And so on. Turns out there's quite a competition.

Turns out I win! Or maybe I lose. Either way, Rhode Island apparently has the worst drivers in the country. A recent study gave written driver's tests to a bunch of current drivers, and it turns out the folks in Rhode Island averaged 71 out of 100, eight points above failing and the lowest in the country. So I guess if you're passing a driver who's scribbling a written test on top of the steering wheel, you're all set unless he has an Ocean State license plate.

Incidentally, the story is hilarious but I don't think it's true. There are certain Rhode Island stereotypes - the rolling stop, and who really needs a turn signal - but driving here is no more difficult than anywhere else I've been. In fact, driving around here is a lot easier than in a lot of other places, mostly because drivers here are rational. Have you ever noticed that Florida drivers don't understand the concept of a high-speed lane? Here's how you can tell if that matters: does the thought of slow cars driving right next to each other in every single lane upset you? If you're like me and Marlins ace Josh Beckett, it probably does.

Or we can just blame Florida for being the weird state. Truthfully, I suspect driver talent is pretty evenly divided across our fair country. (Not around the world though: those Italians drive with a death wish.) So I'm happy to call it a truce: just get out of my fucking lane or I'll hit you with a big shell. You wanna get rolled?

May 29, 2005

The End is Near: Donate Now

I think everyone can agree with me that John Edwards really is focused like a laser on the North Carolina 2008 Senate race. The UNC center on poverty, positioning for the 2008 presidential race and his wife's cancer are all just ruses; Edwards, according to Senator Elizabeth Dole, "is conducting meetings throughout our state. Edwards is a multimillionaire who put millions of dollars of his personal wealth into his last campaign for the U.S. Senate and defeated a popular incumbent Republican." (Thanks to Political Wire for the catch.)

It's not fair to make fun of Dole for this; you have to have crazy stuff like this in fundraising letters this far away from the election. I remember the mid-2003 fundraising letters from the National Republican Senatorial Committee, basing their pleas on the assumption that Hillary Clinton was running for the 2004 presidency, irrelevant to senatorial campaigns even if anyone but Craig Crawford still believed she would run. But it's still funny to look at these things, since they're clearly not meant to see the light of day. This is what we'll be seeing next:

  • Florida Senate 2006: Bill Nelson is the Democratic incumbent. But former Mets pitcher Al Leiter, widely assumed to be a 2008 New Jersey Republican Senate candidate, just signed with the Marlins. Will Senator Al turn his eyes to the Sunshine State? If not, is Josh Beckett old enough to run?

  • California Governor 2006: "Friends, Tom Cruise is the very definition of girlie man. That's fine when he's still making movies, but if he and the liberal special interests have their way, the War of the Worlds we'll be seeing will be between the liberal special interests and my termination of California's problems."

Actually, it might not be that far a leap for Edwards to run for Senate: if, God forbid, Team Edwards 2008 can't get the job done in the presidential primary, he'd still have time to run for Senate if no other Democrat wants it. But isn't Dole running for president in 2008 too? She does have one thing right though: "These Democrats and their liberal special interest allies will stop at nothing to defeat a member of the Republican leadership!"

Well, pretty much.

How Are These Guys Not Popular?

The Portsmouth Herald had an article a few days ago on the Free State Project, the group of libertarians hoping to all move to New Hampshire en large enough masse to shift the politics in the libertarian direction, since attempting to convince the current electorate isn't doing the trick. They expected 20,000 people to actually show up; since turnout has turned out, shall we say, slightly lower, they decided to just relocate to the specific town of Gorham, NH. Yes, if you're lucky, your sleepy New England town may have already been invaded by a group of near-anarchist fanatics who equally loathe drug laws, taxpayer-funded public schools, and idiots like you who don't get it. So the good folks of Gorham got ticked off at the new neighbors for the unfortunate tone of recent town meetings, and the Free Staters decided to calm things down a notch.

Now they're back with a new tactic: publicity arrests! The Free Staters say New Hampshire has ridiculous laws that only clog freedom, so they've taken it upon themselves to violate these laws and get arrested so that we may understand what a police state we've become. The first blow for freedom is already in the books; turns out manicuring without a license (watch out, ladies) carries a sentence of "one year of good behavior." Did we lose a war? Fortunately, the Herald article focuses on the Free Staters' continued quest, and their next target: refusing to show ID at airports! The guinea pig, a Free Stater named Russell Kanning, may be right when he says, "No one really knows what the rules are in that world," a thought that I hope consoles him when he's hanging upside down in an Uzbeki prison.

Beyond this one guy's story, however, the current protest strategy shows the Free Staters still have a long way to go before they start winning over the masses. Publicity arrests are a big improvement over antagonizing the entire town you're trying to make over, sure, but who's going to look at these incidents and come over to their side? No one gives a what-for about manicure licenses, and no one agrees with them on airport IDing. I mean, they really chose airport IDs as an issue? "Come on, join up with us - we'll make you less safe from terrorists." Great idea, guys. How's the revolution coming?

If they really wanted to make a scene, they'd go to the Circuit City in Manchester (it's where I bought my cell phone!), buy a high-def TV, and refuse to pay the sales tax. The assembled press will have an opportunity to buy their niece a graduation present after they cover the arrest, and the Free Staters would finally have a cause that normal people could rally behind. See, it sounds so easy. The only problem is that New Hampshire doesn't have a sales tax, which might serve as a clue that the Free Staters have picked a pretty free state (the "Live Free or Die" motto might have been another hint) and there's not much need for political upheaval. Try telling that to the poor souls who have to manicure with a license, though. Who ever could have guessed libertarians would be politically inept?

Josh Beckett: Don't Let The Bastards Grind You Down

It appears that Marlins ace Josh Beckett is a bit of a powderkeg, according to a report in today's New York Times. When things don't go his way on the mound, he gets angry at himself, others and inanimate objects. Even though the only person he's ever thrown anything at is Marlins president David Samson, organizations like the New York Times still act as if Josh Beckett's behavior is weird, disruptive, or even anything to be ashamed of.

Look, Josh Beckett is a winner. I don't know if everyone's forgetting the 2003 World Series or not, but Josh Beckett has the intangibles that win ballgames. This New York Times report does nothing but show example after example in which Josh Beckett has proven his iron will to win. That's dedication. You've got to bring the killer instinct into every game you play, and if that attitude doesn't simply turn off the second you hand the ball to your manager in disgust, then maybe someone should think twice about leaving baseball equipment all around a baseball field.

So here's the conclusion from the twerps at the New York Times: if Josh Beckett gets rolled, Josh Beckett gets upset. Would that everyone had such grace under big shell.

RI-SEN: Laffey's Steel Chair to Chafee

The Rhode Island's Future blog has been focusing (like a laser!) on the Rhode Island Senate race, a cursory look shows that things are likely to get a lot more interesting. (Yes, this is the same race that Matt Brown is running in. Yes, that's the guy I wrote about five pages down. No, he didn't write this post. Yes, he's Rhode Island's future.) First off, our friends at RI Future are saying the evidence shows that Cranston Mayor Stephen Laffey will challenge incumbent Lincoln Chafee in the GOP primary. They say the best proof is that one of Laffey's friends just registered laffeyforsenate.com; I say their best proof is this National Review story ripping Chafee and predicting Laffey's rise. National Review, and its community-oriented online counterpart, are super-effective conservative advocacy machines, about as well connected in Republican Washington as an organization can get. Honestly, I no longer believe in coincidences in Republican messaging, and if websites are registered for the conservative challenger the same week an influential magazine writes, "Conservatives would not be any worse off with a Democrat than with Chafee in the Senate," look, the guy's running. So here we are: two solid Democratic candidates, our nominally Republican incumbent, and a primary challenge from the right. If you like interesting campaigns half as much as I do, this should be a good one.

Still, I'm not sure what this means for the race. The conventional wisdom is that Laffey could well beat Chafee in the primary, but he'd never win the general election. The logic's not bad. Primary electorates skew away from the center, Rhode Island has some of the lowest turnout rates in the country, you've only got a population around a million to begin with. Add that up, and you could easily imagine Laffey convincing just enough conservatives to pull off the upset. Then, the philosophy goes, Laffey loses the general election: Laffey is way conservative and Rhode Island is way liberal. RI usually has amongst the highest support in the country for Democratic presidential candidates, the state legislature is seriously something like 85% Democratic, and anecdotally, it was only when I left the state after growing up here that I realized there were valid reasons to support Republican candidates. In such a Democratic state, then, it's not that unfeasible that Laffey could win a low-turnout GOP primary, at which point he'd get shellacked by Brown or Whitehouse.

Still, I'm not convinced about the general election either. For starters, you really can't count Chafee out until he's lost. Sure, his reelect is something like 36, but I can see Chafee assembling a strong coalition regardless. For all the supposed conservatism of Republican primary electorates, Rhode Island is still a pretty liberal state, and the generally preferred level of government activity is pretty high. Chafee's name recognition will be an asset, too: I've always found incumbents to do surprisingly well in primaries, usually because some people vote every time and vote for the guy they know better. Finally, look, in Rhode Island a lot of people just know each other. It just happens, people know the guy, they've worked with him, or they're good friends with his cousin. That's the state I live in. So add all those factors together, and Chafee just might be able to work his way into a win here. They thought he'd be an easy target in 2000 too.

I also disagree that Laffey will be an easy knockdown in the general election. If he beats the incumbent in the primary, he's going to ride a wave of momentum that he might be able to turn into widespread populism in the two months between the primary and the general. He's a really popular guy, and he's been skilled at casting his actions while mayor as populist uprisings against the entrenched establishment. That always plays well around here (the statue on top of the state house is a guy named Independence Man, and we declared our indepedence from the Brits two months early), so I'm not convinced that a Democrat listing Laffey's conservative viewpoints will necessarily win. He'll have no shortage of money, and apparently he's got the fire in the belly worse than any politician out there.

Now, I'm not saying it'll be a surprise for Democrats to pick up a seat by smooshing Laffey around for being worse than Hitler, but I suggest there remain other possibilities. But it's always great to have an exciting campaign in your home state, so to all my readers starved for more commentary on topics peripherally related to wrestling and video games: you haven't heard the last of this one!

May 28, 2005

Грабителю сломали шею indeed

And you thought there was nothing to learn from pro wrestling. I told you in Japan they teach kids right:

http://daynews.ru/index.php?act=show_news&id=939751

May 26, 2005

Hot New Star Wars Rumor

Cinescape prints stuff readers send in about their conversations with George Lucas, which may or may not be made up:


I said what do you think would be more interesting.... telling a story prior to PHANTOM MENANCE or after RETURN OF THE JEDI?

(Lucas) said, no question about it, prior to PHANTOM MENACE. He said, that if he did ever do another storyline.... that he would do when the Jedi regained control of the universe from the Dark Lords (there were many of them) 800 years before PHANTOM MENACE. And a young Jedi named Yoda was instrumental in the effort.


Sounds good to me.

I'm an Asman

David Asman is an anchor and reporter for Fox News Channel. I watched a considerable amount of his broadcasts when I did TV monitoring for the Edwards campaign, and he was the absolute typical Fox News guy: I was sure his reporting was biased, but I could never quite put my finger on how.

But while I failed to come up with concrete proof, Media Matters sure didn't. Here's how he interviewed Trent Lott on the judicial nominees deal:


ASMAN: So, Senator, if we should have done it and if we had the votes to do it in the Senate -- if you guys in the Republican Party did -- then why did you need a compromise?

They keep calling themselves fair and balanced, I'll keep calling them biased.

Mike Piazza: Will He Learn His Lesson?

From today's New York Times on the Mets:


Mike Piazza started this trip by getting an autograph from Rush Limbaugh, his main political influence, then compared the experience to meeting George Washington, Abraham Lincoln or the pope. From that point on, Piazza went 0 for 9 with six strikeouts and hit into a double play.

What? He was reminded to be conservative with his offense.

You Get What You Pay For

I can't tell if the feeling I have is schadenfreude or sour grapes, but it's great fun regardless. Here are choice paragraphs from a Washington Post article titled, "Business Groups Tire of GOP Focus On Social Issues."


"I'm inclined to support the Republican Party, but the question becomes, how much other stuff do I have to put up with to maintain that identification?" asked Andrew A. Samwick, a Dartmouth College economics professor who until recently was chief economist of Bush's Council of Economic Advisers.

"I don't know a single business group involved in the judicial nominees," said R. Bruce Josten, an executive vice president of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce. "Nada, none, zip."
...
Economic conservatives grew restless during the first Bush term, when federal budget surpluses turned to yawning deficits, federal spending soared and the Republican-controlled Congress passed a Medicare drug benefit that marked the largest new federal entitlement since Lyndon B. Johnson was president.
...
"The potential for high-minded policy reforms to fix entitlements and spur growth and prosperity has degenerated into a hopeless morass," Republican economist Lawrence Kudlow wrote yesterday on the National Review's Web site.
...
But the shift in emphasis may be taking a toll on Republican political support. In an NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll last week, 57 percent of the people polled said Bush had different priorities for the country from their own. Only 35 percent said he shared their priorities. The poll found the president's approval rating at 47 percent, but Congress's rating stood at just 33 percent. Among Republicans, approval of Congress's performance has dropped 11 percentage points since April.

"A big part of the base is pretty disappointed," Kudlow said. "Is this irreparably damaging anything? Probably not yet. But this has been a dreary political springtime."


Oh ho, this is precious. Who paid for the Bush reelection campaign again? It was the anti-abortion activists in Kansas, right? Oh mercy.

May 25, 2005

Let's Attack Rick Santorum

People keep talking to me as if my review of the Rick Santorum profile was supposed to be positive. I feel like I deflated pretty much the whole rationale of his brand of politics, but if it wasn't clear enough, let's go back to the record.

We'll start off with an example of Republican hypocrisy in using legal justifications for clearly social-engineering causes:


In a much-publicized interview in 2003, he argued that the Supreme Court should not overturn state sodomy laws that ban homosexual sex and suggested that such a ruling would create a justification for bigamy, polygamy and incest. At one point, he even raised the specter of bestiality, using the phrase ''man on dog.''

I certainly remember this interview; the reporter's response was, "I'm sorry, I didn't expect to be talking about man on dog with a United States Senator." (The reporter, as it happens, was also married to John Kerry's then-campaign manager. Intrigue abounds.) Now, look, Santorum uses the slippery-slope argument here, but it ruins his case. If we decide that homosexual intercourse is acceptable and legal, he reasons, where do we stop? What kind of sexual behavior is unacceptable? Why is that the marker? Honestly, I don't have answers. Maybe I will in law school. But even now I can see that if the distinction is arbitrary, then that means there's equally no reason to draw the line at heterosexual intercourse and nothing else. Essentially, Santorum uses the same tired social-conservative argument: we should do things this way because that's the way we've always done it. You can dress it up in judicial robes, but it still ain't gonna make sense. Fortunately, Santorum is an authority on more than just the law:

In 2002, in a little-noticed interview that took place in Rome, Santorum told National Catholic Reporter, a U.S.-based weekly, that he considered George W. Bush, a Methodist, to be ''the first Catholic president of the United States.'' (His remark was reminiscent of the novelist Toni Morrison's saying that Bill Clinton was the nation's first black president, although an obvious difference is that there actually has been a Catholic president.)
...
And what about John F. Kennedy? Santorum says he believes that in a political sense, Kennedy shed his Catholicism. (Kennedy's most famous statement on church and state was: ''I do not speak for my church on public matters -- and the church does not speak for me.'')

This, I think, indicates the social conservative mindset: he is the authority. Seriously, who the fuck is Rick Santorum to say that Kennedy wasn't a real Catholic? Two points to mention here. One, you could make a pretty strong case that John Kennedy actually wasn't a real Catholic, with two words: Marilyn Monroe. Santorum, on the other hand, chooses not to focus on Kennedy's assault on his marriage (which, see my earlier post, must mean Santorum's own marriage suffers as a result), instead attacking Kennedy for adhering to the separation of church and state, which I think reveals a lot about where Santorum's priorities lie. Second point: let's not forget, the Catholic Church to which both men belong does have an authority on who's a real Catholic. Did the pope excommunicate Kennedy or otherwise declare him un-Catholic? Of course not, but Rick Santorum seems to disagree pretty strongly here with his infallible leader. Some Catholic! It gets better:

He would go a step further in loosening the reins on charities by letting them read from Bibles and speak of their faith. He said he did not see the difference between a Bible and ''the teachings of Aristotle -- that's a philosophy of life.'' He added: ''Here you have a book that's been pretty well tested over time. So to say, here are some passages from the Bible that may help you, I don't necessarily see that as a negative.''

Are there sects of Aristotelians wandering the earth proclaiming that Aristotle died for our sins? The difference is that Aristotle claims to be a worldview, and the Bible claims to be the worldview. And when you let an organization tell you their worldview is correct to the exclusion of all others, you open the door to letting them limit their services, federally funded mind you, to those who decline to accept their worldview. Does Santorum really not see this?

Fortunately, in the end Santorum shows what got his ideas about faith so fucked up:


Santorum is not a reader of Scripture -- ''I've never read the Bible cover to cover; maybe I should have'' -- and has no passages he clings to when seeking spiritual guidance. ''I'm a Catholic, so I'm not a biblical scholar. I'm not someone who has verses he can pop out. That's not how I interact with the faith.''

He reads magazines and journals offering commentary on religion, among them First Things, which is edited by the theologian Richard John Neuhaus, a former Lutheran minister and a convert to Catholicism.


All right, you've got two texts here. Your faith calls one of them the absolute word of God. The other one is a magazine. Which one do you study?

Blogroll call

I've recently updated the ol' blogroll, so I'll take the opportunity to explain a little bit about the people whose blogs I link to on here.

Laura Kovacs is still my favorite sister, even if she forgets to bring her old monitor down this weekend.

Peter Kovacs is my favorite brother-in-law, partially for treating my sister right but mostly for setting up this blog and answering my dumb questions.

Cay Miller is a chick I knew from Haverford. It is good that she's funny and sweet, but it's better that she linked me first. Well done K!

Galvin Chow has abandoned his years-old quest not to call his defunct online journal a blog. His blog is still in the testing mode, so hurry now before the "terry sucks" post disappears forever!

Emily Withrow is this chick I knew at Bryn Mawr. She lives in Paris and she needs money, so send her some love.

Visit them all! Descriptions of the other links to follow when I'm hard up for posting ideas.

My Evening with Matt Brown

I just got back from a meeting and discussion with Rhode Island Secretary of State and U.S. Senate candidate Matt Brown. First off, I really enjoyed going to a political event that, instead of being in far-off states as in my prior experience, was held at a house that I think literally borders mine. (For those of you from around here, it was on Pond Street.) So that was hot stuff. Fortunately the event itself turned out great on its own merits.

Matt Brown has an interesting background for a Senate candidate. He started the City Year program in which kids do community service for a year. Some kids do it for a year before they go to college, and some kids do it who aren't going to school. It's a great program, besides the community service itself, a lot of the kids doing it are underprivileged or talented people whose lives have lost a bit of momentum. A lot of people have really benefited from this program.

Eventually Matt Brown realizes that if City Year can only accept one out of every 17 kids, there are 16 other talented kids out there who aren't being given the chance to succeed. So he decides that he has to find a bigger organization that can help people get a fair shot, and concludes the only organization big enough is the federal government. Matt Brown has experience in government as Secretary of State, and he decided that the real way to effect change on the level he seeks is the federal government. Hence, the run for U.S. Senate. A lot of candidates, even the ones I like, don't have a real reason for running other than some generic "I can fight for you" reasoning. It's neat (and a little off-putting) to see a candidate who really wants to do something with the office.

In terms of issues, I got the impression that Matt Brown wants to focus on the point where the importance of education meets our government's failure to do enough about it. Everyone knows a lot of our public schools aren't good enough to get those students an education that will prepare them for life. A lot of public universities are now pricing themselves out of a lot of kids' budgets, and more and more good students can't go to public universities because of the money. Aren't our public schools designed to service everybody? They shouldn't be this bad, especially since Matt Brown claims that it's pretty well proven that good schools come from small schools, small classes, and good teachers. If that's true, this ain't rocket science, and you sure don't need to have a series of unfair tests on only two (count 'em) subjects and then start dismissing schools as failures, as Team Republican seems to think will fix our educational system.

But more than that, Matt Brown wants government and elected officials to stop acting like compromise is inherently a victory. Compromise can lead to a lot of good things, but it's a means, not an end. The goal, of course, is to solve problems. This is in stark contrast to our current senator; Lincoln Chafee seems to think of his moderate Republicanism as a gimmick he can use to talk about how he compromises all the time. Again, I don't mind it as a means, but Chafee always leaves out the part about what his compromises did for the state of Rhode Island. What a chump. Anyway, it was good to see Matt Brown keeps his eye on the ball.

So I like Matt Brown. I was most relieved, though, to see his political skills in action. Like it or not, to win a statewide campaign, these guys have to have talents that don't necessarily indicate future performance in office. But Matt Brown is a genuinely funny guy, he's an engaging speaker, he knows how to turn a question his way and, most important, he raised more money in the first quarter than any other Senate challenger. So I'm feeling good about his chances, especially against a guy like Chafee with something like a 36 reelect. All in all, I left the meeting with one thought: I really want Matt Brown to win. Very good times.

A-Rod: you gotta feel the sting

The AP's reporting that Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez, who I'm pretty sure is the highest-paid player in sports, is now stating proudly that he goes to two therapists. Now, this is a pretty good story: here's a kid whose dad left the family at age 9, and with no one really to talk to, he turned to baseball. Now he's arguably the best ballplayer on earth, and he's leveraging his fame to make the very, very underrated point that if you're in therapy, it's for something that probably ain't your fault. That's a really classy thing to do: we need more role models who will stand up in public and say that psychological help is effective and that it has nothing to do with who you are as a person. Add that he's willing to take the private jokes that come with being out in front of the issue, and really, what he's doing is sincerely admirable.

That said, he's a Yankee. Here are some things he might be in therapy for:

  • Lying awake at night, wondering if he cost the Yankees the pennant last year by blatantly cheating, costing the Yanks what little momentum they had left;

  • Lying awake at night, wondering if he was right to sign a $252 million contract when he left Seattle to play for a winner.

  • Lying awake at night, wondering if it was appropriate for him to come into Texas as the Rangers' savior, and then wait only two years before complaining that they weren't committed to winning. I mean, didn't they have the money?

  • Lying awake at night, wondering, if he'd pushed harder to get the Red Sox trade to happen, if he'd have a World Series ring. Is it okay to keep having dreams about watching the Red Sox victory celebration from the bench?

Also, Roger Clemens just injured his groin.

This Is Pretty Much How My Social Life Goes

Thank you McSweeney's:


You're rarer than a five-tool catcher. What? That's not gay slang for anything. I'm talking about my fantasy baseball rotisserie league. No. That's not a gay slang term, either.

- - - -

That sure was quite the make-out session. I've seen windows fog up in movies, but never in real life. Goodness! We really went at it, didn't we? I forget the last time I felt so revved up. Want to head inside? You do? Splendid! Oh, wait. Now I remember the last time I felt so turned on: When I was able to snag Mark Prior with a sixth-round draft pick. Yes, I'll take you home.

- - - -

If my heart were made of bases, you'd be Scott Podsednik.


McSweeney's is actually really good for a style of humor you won't get anywhere else. In case that wasn't evident.

May 24, 2005

I'm sorry, I have to admit it

I'm in love with Mandy Moore. That's right, Mandy Moore. Apparently a few years back there were some guys in Minneapolis who wanted to do a really good covers album, and not only did they get Mandy Moore to do the singing, but they got it released as a Mandy Moore album.

So, apparently Mandy Moore tells people not to listen to her first two albums because they're so terrible, an admirable decision, and she makes up for it with the cover album. There are a few songs most people would recognize (Carole King's "I Feel The Earth Move" and Blondie's "One Way Or Another" are both on there), but the striking track to me is the single, XTC's "Senses Working Overtime." Now, this is a semi-obscure song, in that you'd probably only know it if you like XTC or happened to listen to alternative rock in the 80s. "Senses Working Overtime" is one of my favorites, so I was thrilled to discover this song was remade, and more thrilled to discover the remake is pretty good. I found the video of Mandy Moore doing the song live on Craig Kilborn's show in 2003, and it is awesome. She sings it more clearly than XTC, so I can finally figure out more of the words, but better yet, she does it sincerely, like she genuinely appreciates the song.

I think I'm in love. Anyone know if she lives in the West Village?

Rick Santorum as National Muse

The New York Times Magazine yesterday (hey, I'm still catching up) did an extended profile of Pennsylvania's conservative junior senator, Rick Santorum. The profile is sympathetic; I certainly don't like his politics and I approve of naming disgusting forms of fecal matter after him, but a lot of his worldview sounds downright acceptable. Not better than a Democratic alternative, but it turns out I don't disagree with him on everything. Let's start light:


Lately he has been talking about issues of poverty, and the initiatives he put forward in March, bundled in the Senate Republican Poverty Alleviation Agenda (tax breaks to increase giving to faith-based and community charities; a ''level playing field'' for faith-based groups; programs to promote fatherhood, strengthen families and mentor children of inmates), were consistent with his conservative values.

I suspect this may be the future of American politics. I am not enthused by all of Santorum's specifics, but he deserves some credit for trying. In general, he's on the right track, and putting pressure in the Senate to do something about, say, mentoring children of inmates could do some real good. I think of poverty as the great crisis in America: if all these millions of people with no hope of upward mobility were living middle-class lives, what would it mean for our country, in terms of productivity and innovation? What would it mean for those people, in terms of their happiness? Fortunately, it seems like helping those in the world's worst situations has become one of the hot new topics in politics: besides Santorum, we've got my hero John Edwards launching a new Center on Poverty at the UNC law school, and Senator Sam Brownback of Kansas is helping social conservatives finally put two and two together and put some real weight behind ending mass slaughter in places like Darfur. Granted, Brownback seems most intent on helping Christians, and Santorum has a feverish bent on faith-based initiatives, but the motivation to help people seems sincere, and hopefully the increasing visibility of these politicians (all three are 2008 presidential candidates, barring the unforeseen) will increase the visibility of these issues too. But it doesn't take long for me to lose pace with the guy:

His line of reasoning usually goes like this: The founding fathers were men of faith. They believed in a nation based on traditional, religiously derived values, the same ''moral absolutes'' that he finds in his faith, and to diverge from them is to undermine the health of American society.

Interesting theory. Are you familiar with Deism? It's a religious philosophy that emphasizes natural events and reasoning to draw conclusions about God, as opposed to relying on scripture and revelations. Imagine if a politician today actually tried to make that their religious worldview: they would get nuked by the social conservatives. According to Wikipedia's list of deists, that would render George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, Benjamin Franklin and Thomas Paine unelectable.

So I think Santorum's trying to emphasize a pretty weak link between himself and the founders. More importantly, though, my reading of history doesn't jive with Santorum's at all. When I see references to God in 18th and 19th century politics, it seems to me that politicians use them to explain their philosophies, not to dictate anyone else's. There's a huge difference. The second half of Abraham Lincoln's second inaugural address is pretty much entirely about God, but take a look at what he says:


Both read the same Bible and pray to the same God, and each invokes His aid against the other. It may seem strange that any men should dare to ask a just God's assistance in wringing their bread from the sweat of other men's faces, but let us judge not, that we be not judged. The prayers of both could not be answered. That of neither has been answered fully. The Almighty has His own purposes.

So what's he saying here? To me, he's using a prevailing belief, that we're all children of the same God, as an example of the similarities between the North and South. Note that he's not dictating any sort of policy (unless you count "judge not" here), and he actually says otherwise. If the Almighty has his own purposes, it's not for us on earth to know what those are. Kind of hurts the gay marriage case, doesn't it?

(Speaking of Lincoln and faith: John Edwards once opened a Senate prayer breakfast by telling a story of President Lincoln at a similar gathering. One of his generals suggested that Lincoln pray that God was on their side. Lincoln said, "well, I can't do that, but I will pray that we're on God's side." Again, I don't see how this necessitates back-alley abortions.)

So Rick Santorum raises some thoughtful issues. He also raises some less thoughtful issues:


When I asked him if he viewed gay marriage as a threat to his own marriage, he answered quickly. ''Yes, absolutely,'' he said. ''It threatens my marriage. It threatens all marriages. It threatens the traditional values of this country.''

To me, that quote disqualifies Rick Santorum from high public office. There are two people responsible for Rick Santorum's marriage: Rick Santorum and his wife. If anything on earth should threaten their marriage, the responsibility lies with those two people and the bond that was too weak to withstand outside forces. Any other perspective is both irresponsible and unfair to the rest of the world.

The author of the piece, Michael Sokolove, does his part to find the roots of Santorum's beliefs. Here's where he hits the nail on the head:


Through his 20's and early 30's ... Santorum ... briefly lobbied for the World Wrestling Federation.

That's the real reason for this post, especially since Rick Santorum seems to go after boogeymen with more hypocrisy than Kane and Undertaker:

In 1999, the family received a malpractice award after Karen Santorum sued a chiropractor in Virginia. She testified that she sought treatment for back pain after childbirth in 1996 and suffered a ruptured disk from an improperly administered spinal manipulation. Santorum has been a vocal critic of large malpractice awards and has backed measures to limit damages. Karen Santorum asked for $500,000 and was awarded $350,000 by a jury. A judge finally reduced the award to $175,000, of which Santorum said they received about $75,000 after their lawyer took his share. ''I'm not against all lawsuits,'' Santorum said. ''I think they're appropriate where the case warrants it, and this one did. It was not frivolous.''

What an unbelievable coincidence! OK, last quote and we're out:

Santorum's view is that government programs to help people in need are almost destined to fail, and that a social worker, a substance-abuse counselor or a nurse receiving a paycheck from a faith-based group, rather than from government, will be more caring and more likely to get results. This seems like a stereotype -- a government-employed social worker may, after all, have the same training as the one working for a charity and the same urgent calling to help others -- but Santorum nonetheless sees the secular world as intrinsically cold and unfeeling. Filled with experts.

Again, I'm tempted to like the guy from some parts of the article I'm omitting, but it's opinions like this that just drive me away. I would submit, without proof, that people generally go into government for the same reason they go into politics or church organizations. Anyone want to guess what that is? To imply that government is unfeeling as a rule insults a lot of hard-working people and contradicts human nature. You think a faith-based employee 30 years into the job will be just as effective as on day one? Of course not. But government screwing up is horrible waste; using government money to get the same thing out of proselytizing religious organizations is a godsend.

And dismissing experts as a concept is hilarious too. Santorum says they're "narrow experts," which I guess means they're not as well-versed in life as he is. Thank God we can get condescending jerks out of our government in favor of guys like Rick Santorum, who simply know better than you how you should live your life.

In conclusion, I'd recommend taking in the full tour of Santorum's life as presented, but I do wish the author had written on Santorum's campaign victories. Put another way, he may be a decent guy with some decent ideas, but all told, how the hell did he get elected?

May 23, 2005

A Vinegar-Based Life

The Washington Post finally climbs down from its high horse to talk about the real issues facing our country today:


And so it began, as it has countless times before. Bledsoe and Rogers have been puffing up the barbecue feud between eastern North Carolina and western North Carolina for decades. Bledsoe -- a former newspaper columnist turned best-selling crime book author -- is undeniably Mr. Western-Style, extolling the virtues of melty-tender pork shoulders glazed with a ketchup-based sauce. Rogers is adamantly Mr. Eastern-Style, pontificating about the vinegar-heavy morsels of whole hog favored Down East along North Carolina's coast.
...
"People who would put ketchup in the sauce they feed to innocent children are capable of most anything," Rogers told his readers in the Raleigh News & Observer after word leaked about the barbecue festival bill. "Let the word go forth from this time and place that we, the Eastern North Carolina purveyors of pure barbecue, will not be roadkill for our western kin."
...
"I guess it's the ultimate pork-barreling," said state Rep. Jerry Dockham, a Republican who co-sponsored the bill that would give the barbecue festival in his home county the state's imprimatur.
...
The eastern-style advocates can rightly stake a claim as North Carolina's original barbecue. They smoke an entire hog, or cook it over electrical coils, and slather the meat in a sauce made from vinegar -- usually apple cider -- black pepper and red pepper flakes.

The western style, according to legend, developed in the 1920s in Lexington, where cash-strapped country folk bought barbecue sold from tents outside the courthouse. The meat came from the cheapest part of the pig -- the shoulder. The sauce was sweeter, with heavy doses of sugar and ketchup, some black pepper and only a dash of vinegar.


There is no bigger issue. Eastern Carolina-style, vinegar-based barbecue is the greatest food ever created on God's green earth, no matter how many unidentifiable pig parts you may find. I will brook no dissent on either of the following topics: Eastern Carolina-style is the best, and barbecue is better when the place making it just barely qualified for the health inspector. Also, sweet tea is fantastic.

The D'Souza family figures me out

Took them long enough. At least they've only discovered the radiation, and not the terrible reason why I'm doing it:


The D'Souza family lives in the home on Timberwood Court, and claims the aluminium pieces are necessary to protect them from unknown neighbors who have been bombarding them with radio waves and making them sick.

"(It's) a shield to protect against radiation, because microwave radiation is reflected off of aluminium, so it's a protective measure," resident Sarah D'Souza said.

The D'Souzas said the bombardment began after the first anniversary of the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, and that the radio waves have caused them health problems ranging from headaches to lupus.


Could your family be next? Maybe you should cover your home in a protective wall too.

NARAL endorses Chafee, Democrats begin to leave NARAL

Well this is some ridiculous news for a Monday morning. NARAL, the big pro-choice group, went and endorsed Lincoln Chafee in Rhode Island's Senate race. I speculate they started the process when it looked like pro-lifer and otherwise awesome congressman Jim Langevin was going to run, but he declined. The Democratic candidates are Secretary of State Matt Brown, who I support, and former state Attorney General Sheldon Whitehouse, another good guy. So which of the two is the pro-life candidate that drove NARAL into Chafee's arms? According to the Projo:


Chafee, Brown and Whitehouse all classify themselves as strongly "pro-choice," meaning they support the right of women to choose abortions.

Unfortunately, this is a big deal for the campaign. No one sits at home waiting for marching orders from NARAL, but you can be sure this is going to pop up in Chafee's TV ads next year when he wants to prove his moderate credentials.

I really don't know why NARAL's doing this. There's one idea, that they may just be spiteful about the Democrats making Harry Reid the Senate leader, running Bob Casey against Rick Santorum in Pennsylvania, and flirting with Jim Langevin in RI. All three are pro-life, and they can't exactly endorse Rick Santorum, so they're going with Chafee instead of the two pro-choice candidates in Rhode Island. They also claim Brown and Whitehouse don't have voting records, so they've yet to display their true pro-choice credentials, but if you ask me that's a red herring. Brown has actually gone ahead and said he'd apply a litmus test to judges: if you're pro-life, he'll vote you down. Does that pledge not count? If he broke it, he couldn't get away with it.

Here's one more reason, also from the Projo:


A further wrinkle on the other side of the abortion issue: NARAL President Nancy Keenan said she hoped the group's early endorsement -- to be formalized when Chafee addresses the organization today -- will help the senator sink a potential primary fight from Cranston Mayor Stephen Laffey.

This has been the interesting subplot of the RI Senate race for some time: what could popular and conservative Stephen Laffey beat Chafee in a Republican primary? The answer, in my opinion, is yes, but it misses the larger point, that there's no chance in hell Stephen Laffey could win the general election. I mean come on guys. NARAL says, "We need Lincoln Chafee's sensible, moderate, Republican voice" in the Senate. Actually, we don't. We need another Democrat.

Fortunately, this has sparked a movement at the fabulously influential DailyKos blog, namely, that Democrats have got to stop being held hostage by interest-group politics. The whole post is gold, but my favorite part is the close:


The era of the single issue group is in its closing days. Note the new generation of activist organizations -- MoveOn, Democracy for America, the blogs -- all confederations of activists, banding together for the common progressive cause.

That's the future of our party. I'd love to see the single issue groups become quasi-think tanks, pumping out research and information the rest of us could use to generate activism. Unlike NARAL or Sierra Club, these confederations can walk and chew gum at the same time. We could work to defend a women's right to choose on Monday and fight to proctect ANWR on Tuesday.

To those who fight to defend the status quo, in which the single issue groups dominate the Democratic Party, just one more argument -- they've lost. We haven't won a majority of the popular vote in a presidential election since 1976. We've lost our congressional majorities. We've lost the courts. A unified conservative movement has systematically attacked and destroyed our divided side -- from labor, to the environmental movement, to the choice groups. Those groups have failed.

Their singular focus on themselves, at the exclusion of all else, has cost our movement dearly. And if there's one thing none of us should tolerate, it's failure.

So defend your favorite issue, but don't defend the system. A system of special interest checkboxes won't win elections. A principled core philosophy will.


Couldn't say it better.

Thanks for your patience

OK, I'm back and ready to start scribbling. More posts to follow shortly.

May 18, 2005

Stop checking this site for a while

You may remember my East Coast Road Trip Journal from late 2002. You may also remember that Carl Knutson was the only person to respond to my pleas for feedback. As a result, once Carl arrives in RI this afternoon, all you chumps become second-rate.

In other words, posting may become sparse starting now, through the weekend. Deal with it. If Frist doesn't have the votes, don't say I didn't warn you.

Penny Arcade Is Funny Again

Yeah, I think I'm going to just keep doing this:

Newt in Iowa: The Gingrichian Life

Yeah, yeah, we all get it - Newt Gingrich is crazy and still way too politically radioactive to run a presidential campaign. But it's a good thing he's touring New Hampshire and Iowa, because he's saying a lot of things other people aren't. Here are some choice bits from David Yepsen's column yesterday in the Des Moines Register:


He's also searching for improved ways to conduct campaigns so the nation can better focus on serious issues.
...
Gingrich, during a visit with a group of us at the paper, admitted, "I don't have an answer. The reason I wrote the book and the reason I'm out here is trying to begin to figure out: How do you set a different tone? Ironically, Hillary (Clinton) and I have the same instinct, which is the country is just sick of it. Our partisans aren't, but the country is just sick of it."

Honestly, anyone who doesn't have the same instinct at this point is just broadly out of touch, which, I suspect, says a lot about our politicians. Let's also count this the first time on the blog I officially said Hillary Clinton might be politically smart enough to win the 2008 election.

Gingrich the historian said a little perspective is in order. "It's helpful not to over-romanticize the past," and he noted how political campaigns have always been raucous affairs. Thomas Jefferson and Alexander Hamilton "subsidized papers to smear the other side." And a great deal of rum and whiskey was poured around election time for voters in many early elections. Abraham Lincoln was vilified by his enemies as a black man, which was about the worst thing you could say about someone at the time.

"It is inevitable we're going to have a lot of junk, just as we had a lot of junk in the 19th century," Gingrich said.

However, there were also things like the 1858 Lincoln-Douglas debates in the Illinois U.S. Senate race that year. ... Gingrich said a modern-day version of that might be helpful. He also said there should be no moderator in the 2008 presidential debates. "Just two adults talking . . . that would change the quality of those debates."


What, no reference to how Lincoln was called Honest Ape? The idea of no moderator in the 2008 debates would really be exciting. Imagine how it would go: say one candidate gets to speak first in the first debate, and the other candidate gets to speak first in the next two. They talk for a while, and their only time limit is audience tolerance. See, the other candidate couldn't interrupt, because it would look bad, but the first candidate couldn't hog the floor, because that looks bad too. Each candidate would try to maximize speaking time, but they'd have to keep it civil on the surface and increasingly move into harsh but pleasantly worded commentary. Oh, I'd love it. And best of all, since the candidates are two of the few political insiders who actually do give a shit about their health care plans, they'd spend a lot more time talking about substantive issues. If the 2008 debates had one moderated debate, one unmoderated debate, and one town hall, I'm confident we'd move away from moderated debates in the future.

And, he said, "I've thought seriously that if I ever did run, I'd refuse to do any cattle shows. If you think that gets you good leadership, you shouldn't even think about running. It's silly. It demeans the office. Any random person who thinks they can run can show up. A lot of it trivializes the whole process of picking the leader of the most complicated society in the world."

(So I guess we might not see him at that mother of all cattle shows - the big straw poll Iowa Republicans do in Ames each summer before their January presidential caucuses.)


Now this is another exciting idea. I was surprised in the 2004 general election that the Republicans never came up with any offending quotes from John Kerry during any of the Democratic cattle calls. It was amazing to watch: everyone knew a million debates (or forums, or joint appearances...) was a bad idea, but you can't turn down the Human Rights Campaign, or the Building Trades, or NARAL, or any of these other organizations without getting into serious trouble. When three candidates skipped out on the NAACP annual meeting, after showing up at the Urban League forum the month before, NAACP president Kweisi Mfume called those three candidates "persona non grata" and made them come back two days later and beg for forgiveness. It was embarrassing for the candidates, NAACP, and the process itself. (Incidentally, Mfume's running for Senate now, and this is why I don't support him, at least in the primary.) The Republicans don't have this problem as much as the Democrats, who are increasingly becoming the coalition of interest groups of which they've always been accused. Still, it's good to see one candidate smart enough to back off of these cattle calls, and to announce it well enough in advance that other candidates can follow and Newt himself can take a slightly smaller political hit.

So, again, I wouldn't support Newt Gingrich for dogcatcher. But he's got a lot of great ideas, and the other candidates would be wise to pay attention.

May 17, 2005

Book Report: Buck Up, Suck Up, and Come Back When You Foul Up

I love the idea of doing book reports on all of the books I read, but that leaves out everything I've done since Christmas. So you're not going to get reviews of What's the Matter with Kansas?, Dick Schaap's autobiography, James Chace's 1912 on that year's presidential campaign, the Daily Show book, Howard Dean's informative post-meltdown pamphlet on what's wrong with the Democrats, or anything else I've been reading.

Fortunately, I do remember enough of the book I read immediately before the DiMaggio biography, James Carville and Paul Begala's Buck Up, Suck Up, and Come Back When You Foul Up. I love the title: it's funny, it's valuable to remember, and it's clearly not the same words they used in the War Room. Fortunately, the book is much the same way.

Carville and Begala make two main arguments here: one, that lessons in politics are useful in life, and two, that good living makes good politics. The first argument is simple and true. Anyone who ever wants to convince people or win an argument can learn effective strategies from Carville and Begala. The second point implies a Seven Habits of Highly Effective People-style list of strategies and philosophies for good living and good politics, which is thankfully exactly what we get. (I believe strongly that the Seven Habits is about as close you can get to a literal must-read.) The presentation is solid and lively, with anecdotes about politicians, friends from home, and happily, self-effacing examples of when our authors screwed up. It's a light read, a fun read, and a tremendously useful read. I find it easy to give this book a thumbs up.

The authors make one stumble by omission. The idea that good values make good politics is true, but it's not as easy as Carville and Begala imply. They make their point at the end, almost as a reflection: wow, look, these are the strategies, and they're honest too, that's great. But the truth, and the authors know it, is that poor long-term values can work effectively in the short term, and in campaign life, sometimes short-term is all you need. Here's an example: Carville and Begala title a chapter "Be Open." That's true if the Washington Post is getting on your case for stonewalling on Whitewater. (Incidentally, yikes, if I ever stonewall the Washington Post, please slap me. That's like flipping off a cop when he's following you with the sirens on.) But honesty doesn't always work like it should. Sure, if you can pierce through the claptrap and tell people what they already know, but no one will admit, it can be a powerful way to connect. That won't always work, though. A candidate can tell the truth about his old affair and think it's a smart move - hey, at least I was honest - but it's not. You'll still get smacked for it. If the press doesn't, your opponent will. Don't always "be open."

To be fair, Carville and Begala don't live in this kind of dream world. They advocate tough strategies, like a section called "Attack, Dammit, Attack" and another on mastering the counterpunch. Taken as a whole, their strategies do work, and they're honest, and they'll give your audience a fair opportunity to make a decision. It's too bad they couldn't find a cure for temptation.

E3: System Overload

So all three major console manufacturers are unveiling their new systems. Microsoft is the only one who will go for winter 2005; Nintendo and Sony are releasing theirs in winter 2006, barring, of course, Nintendo's traditional delay. As Nintendo game design legend Shigeru Miyamoto says, "a delayed game is eventually good. A bad game is bad forever."

First I should state my biases: I am a Nintendo guy. I've never owned a non-Nintendo system, and really the only reason I still play videogames are Mario Kart, Zelda, and Mario. So I don't really care about the other systems, unless they're interesting.

So, my first interest is Nintendo. The new Nintendo machine, still code-named as Revolution, looks like this:

Now, apparently some Nintendo exec said back in the day that the Gamecube, their current system, is powerful enough for anything they want to do. Since Nintendo games are mostly cartoony anyway, that's probably good for them, but not as good for companies like Capcom that are trying to port over horror-style games like Resident Evil that depend on lifelike graphics. So one school of thought is that Nintendo is just releasing a new system because they have to if they want to stay competitive. Another school is that Nintendo needs a new system to implement innovations: they have led the way on updating controllers to include shoulder buttons and analog sticks, and we haven't seen their next controller yet. Also, with Revolution Nintendo will finally embrace online gaming, which is a highlight in itself, but the exciting corollary is that they're going to make their entire previous library available for download. So if you want to replay the original Mario Bros. or take on Harrison in Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball for SNES, you can do it. That's awesome.

Sony decided to throw caution to the wind and name their next system after their two other systems. The Playstation 3, due holiday 2006, looks like this:

Yes, that's the Spider-Man logo. Apparently the PS3 is 35 times more powerful than the PS2, and runs on like 8 different CPUs at once. Again, I don't play many PS2 games so I can't really comment on the library. That said, apparently for the game version of Spider-Man 3 they're just going to run the CGI from the Spider-Man 2 movie. Put another way, whatever advanced system that Sony Pictures was using to create the effects in Spider-Man 2 is about as powerful as the PS3. Yikes. Finally, I'm impressed they stuck with the same button layout on their controller. Does anyone think the two analog sticks should be where they are? You can screw that up once, but screw that up twice, and ... [awkward pause] ... I won't screw up again.

Microsoft announced the Xbox 360 on an MTV special last week with the Killers and Elijah Wood. Elijah Wood looks like this:

Yeah, I know, they all look like iMacs or laser printers. Take your pick. Microsoft plans on launching its flagship game, Halo 3, not with their system launch but with Sony's next system launch. Observers have speculated for some time that Nintendo will fall further and further back in third place in the US market, and sooner than later will have to exit the console business. (Sega did the same thing; they make games now but not systems.) This ignores Nintendo's impressive profit margin, but for the sake of wild speculation let's go for it. Nintendo and Microsoft are both based in Redmond, Washington, and supposedly at events like this week's E3 the Microsoft and Nintendo executives go get beers together and make jokes about Sony.

So how about this idea: Nintendo decides it's not worth it being a system behind on something every time around (last time it was online play, this time it's HDTV support) and sells out to Microsoft. Nintendo realizes that Microsoft consoles are well powerful enough to support whatever Zelda and Mario Kart iterations they want to go with, and if Microsoft's in a good mood they even let Nintendo design controllers, since that's what Nintendo's good at. Who goes wrong with this? Anyone? All I care about are Nintendo games; I'll go where they go. So let's see how the next couple of years go in the video game industry, then let's start the petition.

The Black Art

I'm not even sure myself how I got to reading about the joys and pitfalls of studying correspondence between 19th-century upper-class New England sisters, but I found an interesting passage. (In the article I mean, I'm just reading Slate here.)


For 19th-century women, though, letter-writing and even journal-keeping were quasi-public activities. The "black art," as Mary Peabody referred to the skills required in correspondence, was practiced intensively by schoolgirls and young women, who frequently commented in their letters on both the form and substance of the mail they received as they worked to develop a mature style. Travel journals served as entertainment at "reading parties" for groups of women friends eager for news of the world, before they were passed by hand among a wider network of acquaintances and eventually down through the generations.

See, now that's interesting. If there's one difference I've noticed between olden times and modern America, and there is, it's that people used to be able to communicate much better. The Joe DiMaggio book would quote him using big words and effective language, yet he was supposed to be some Dago (their words, not mine) kid from a crummy fishing village. Did they just focus on this better at school? I assume schools then had better standards across the board, but I wouldn't be surprised if the focus on effective communication was stronger then too.

Honestly, I think we do have a problem with writing instruction these days. Maybe the fault doesn't lie with the teachers, and people just abandon writing and forget how to do it; anyone who's been in a button-down work environment and read company emails knows that most people write like chumps. But I do think the writing we get taught in school isn't that effective; all you really learn to do is write academic papers. It's not necessarily often that people have to learn how to write charming and witty essays, but it certainly helps when you can. (I write a mean thank-you note, I'll tell you what.)

I hope this blog is somewhat insightful, but the real reason I'm doing it is to practice my writing skills. (And send out hilarious links to my friends. And to see what kind of hits I get.) Unfortunately, not everyone is going to take up a blog or care about their writing quality when they do. That's why I think a little more instruction in the black art may be just what we need.

Craig Crawford is an idiot

I was shocked and outraged today to discover that MSNBC analyst and Congressional Quarterly columnist Craig Crawford has just written a book called, I shit you not, Attack the Messenger: How Politicians Turn You Against the Media. The title is both amusing and ironic, because it implies politicians turn the public against the media to deflect attention from their own transgressions, whereas actually the public should be turned against Craig Crawford because he's an idiot.

I am confident that Craig Crawford is a wonderful guy, and I'm sure he's a great father to a fantastic family. I'm so confident of this, because he obviously spends all his work hours being a great dad when he should be studying politics. On the Edwards campaign, Craig Crawford had the rep among the media-monitoring team and our fellow TV fans as being the most reliable spewer of conventional wisdom in TV news, no matter how out of touch with reality he may be.

It's all the worse because I appreciate Crawford's apparent focus on the Bush administration moves like attacking Dan Rather, Helen Thomas, and Newsweek, while creating their own news reports and relying on reliably Republican and dreadfully unqualified former male escorts during press conferences. But if the guy never has any insight on TV or in his column, why would I want to read his book?

Let me give a couple examples. I remember in mid-2003 seeing Craig Crawford say on MSNBC that he had reserved hotel rooms for the November filing deadline for the New Hampshire primary. Yes, it's what you think it is: he wanted to be there when Hillary Clinton registered to run for president. I did a real quick Nexis search, and the first result I clicked on, a CNBC appearance with Brian Williams on 11/13/2003, yields pretty much the same thing:


DAWN FRATANGELO, anchor: This is an important weekend for the Democratic Party in Iowa. Craig Crawford, a CNBC political analyst, is with us tonight from Des Moines.

Good place to be, because this is a big weekend for the Democrats there, right?

Mr. CRAIG CRAWFORD (Congressional Quarterly): It sure is, Dawn. They're all coming out, and Hillary Clinton will be here.

FRATANGELO: And Hillary Clinton, you believe--you're talking a lot about her. November 21st is the cutoff date to file in New Hampshire. Are you--do you believe that she could slip in to New Hampshire?

Mr. CRAWFORD: It's running out of time, isn't it? I'm going to go out there to New Hampshire next week and wait for her. It's sort of like waiting for Godot, though, I think, or the Maytag repairman. I don't think Hillary will get in but it's a possibility. It's not out of the--out of this world. Believing Hillary Clinton will run for president in 2004 is much like believing in UFOs, Dawn. You know, some people do and some people don't. I'm not sure I rule out UFOs either. [Terry side note: At this point in the campaign, the correct answer to her question is "No."]

FRATANGELO: But they're--you--you're talking about the weekend for the Democrats, the big dinner there. This will be the caucuses there, this will be before the debate hosted by Tom Brokaw. How important is this weekend for the Democrats?

Mr. CRAWFORD: Well, this is getting to the point.
...
It--it--all the premium is on organization. This weekend all the candidates are here. Hillary Clinton headlines a big dinner, the big annual dinner of the Iowa Democratic Party tomorrow night. Got a lot of people scratching their heads. If she wants to dampen speculation about her presidential ambitions, coming here to Iowa to give a speech to 7500 Democrats is kind of a weird way to do that.


See what I mean? Even when it's long become apparent she really wasn't running, he still brings every conversation back to her. For the record, having Hillary keynote the Iowa Jefferson-Jackon Dinner was a great move for everyone, because it meant the keynote speaker was someone who didn't have a horse in that race. She speaks on Democratic values in general; the candidates discuss the particulars.

Fortunately, Crawford storms ahead into another blunder:


FRATANGELO: But the Democrats have to look at some numbers. One number is good for them. The falling approval rating for the president dropped a bit this week. The other number they have to be concerned about is that President Bush passed the $100 million fund-raising mark. How can they compete with that?

Mr. CRAWFORD: I know. When you look at the new economic numbers coming out, company growth as high as 20 percent in some sectors, and then President Bush, as you say, raising $100 million in six months, and 1 1/2 million in Florida today, I look at these Democrats and look at that news and think it's like that movie "Sixth Sense," you know, where the clairvoyant boy says, 'I see dead people.' Sometimes when I look at the Democrats, I think of that line.

FRATANGELO: OK, Craig, I'm sure they appreciate that.

Mr. CRAWFORD: Yeah, I guess.

Yeah, I guess too. Except that the DNC outraised the RNC in 2004. I'm pretty sure Bush wound up outraising Kerry, but it wasn't by much, and the Democratic candidates as a whole may have outraised the Republican field as a whole (i.e. Bush). Did anyone expect this to happen? Not really. But how are we supposed to take this guy seriously when he treats his warmed-over predictions like gospel, and then keeps getting them wrong? How about this, homeslice: if you're not sure, don't act like you are.

That's what's causing the disconnect between the press and the public these days. Journalists speak with authority, and they're wrong more often than they're not. (Does anyone remember when pollster John Zogby announced that Kerry would win on the Daily Show a week before the election?) National Journal, the influential insider publication, did a weekly survey of top insiders in fall 2003 on who would win the Democratic nomination. I remember one week, out of 50 votes, Dean had 48 and Edwards had 2. (Two Edwards advisors were inexplicably included in the voting pool.) Sure, I thought Dean was going to win too, but what kind of record of accuracy is this? I know, it's tough going to Georgetown dinner parties and admitting you really don't know who's going to win. But you're not an oracle, so stop acting like it. Maybe then we can talk about how unfair it is to attack the messenger.

E3: Twilight Princess trailer

The latest trailer to the next Zelda game, and the first to appear since the subtitle was revealed.

http://www.zelda.com/universe/game/legendzelda/

My comments (with spoilers) under the fold.

  • I'm impressed by the dark-looking mood of the game overall. Fights in the rainstorm, running through a dark forest lit only by Link's lamp, imprisonment in some castle spire, and of course Link turning into a wolf at night. Wind Waker, even in its darker moments, never seemed to lose its bright spirit. Here's hoping that Twilight Princess, a name we've got to get used to, like it or not, can keep its depressing feel.

  • I've also got to give credit to the Zelda team for returning to the more realistic graphical style while keeping some of the neat flourishes of Wind Waker. The spaceship (?) that dropped out the monsters at the beginning of the trailer has the same glowing-outlines style as the statues in the Tower of the Gods in Wind Waker, in my mind one of that game's highlights. Plus when Link kills enemies, uh, defeats enemies, they seem to disappear in a Wind Waker-ish puff of smoke. That stuff's awesome, and since this is still all cartoons anyway, it works like a charm.

  • The damn owl seems to be back. Let's hope he plays a useful role in the plot, like in Link's Awakening, and not an unnecessary interruption like in Ocarina of Time. (Update: Galvin says it's a hawk. More below.)

  • I LOVE the black-and-white color scheme. It's like Sin City, but more apocalyptic.

  • Who the shit is that riding wolf Link? I HATE unnecessary characters in Zelda games. If it's not Zelda (or Sheik, or Tetra...) or the King of Hyrule, I'm going to be pissed. Actually, I'm pretty confident it's not, but something's up. Noted website non-updater Galvin Chow remarked that this new character looks almost Wind Waker-ish in graphical style, and if you look at the logo at the end, the vertical part looks just like this character's headgear.

  • Thanks to Galvin again for this gem: apparently there's a movie or something called Ladyhawk, where these two people are in love, except the guy turns into a wolf every sunset, and the girl turns into a hawk by day, so they've only got one minute at twilight where they're both human. And what's that alighting on Link in the trailer? A hawk! (I still think it looks like an owl.)

  • Another genius move: There's a scene in the previous trailer where Link performs some action (probably putting on the Lens of Truth, like from Ocarina) and can see all these zombie spirits staring at him. They try that again in this trailer with wolf Link and this other character, and it turns out there are these two rat-like ghosts attacking wolf Link. How awesome.

  • The boomerang is GLOWING. That's hot.

  • The Goriyas are back. That's hot too. If you recall from the first two Zeldas, Goriyas were those big guys who threw boomerangs at you. Now they're more like monkeys, and they can jump around faster than you, and throw boomerangs at you. That's scary.

May 16, 2005

Back to the Spider-Man 3/4

Well, the new rumor is that James Franco, who plays Harry Osborn in the Spider-Man saga, has said that Spider-Man 3 will start filming in January - and they're going to start on Spider-Man 4 immediately afterwards. If true, awesome. If not, I love Spider-Man movies. Here's where from I got it.

Fun with endangering your tax-exempt status

The New York Times today takes a look at that community down in North Carolina where the preacher had to step down after kicking John Kerry supporters out of his flock. I'm actually not that happy to gloat in the story (it looks mostly like a small rural town being torn asunder, and that's about it) but the story has a surprising amount of interesting subplots. Here's one:


Mr. Chandler told members: "The question then comes in the Baptist Church, 'How do I vote?'; let me just say this right now, if you vote for John Kerry this year you need to repent or resign. You have been holding back God's church way too long."

Mr. Chandler, according to a tape recording of his sermon, added, "And I know I may get in trouble for saying that, but just pour it on."


Yeah, never do that. You know intellectually it's a bad idea to keep going, but you're in the moment, and you're sure you're right, and ... yeah. Just stop.

Most of those who left were Democrats, but the conflict cannot be reduced to party lines - Haywood County, like many parts of the South, has more registered Democrats than Republicans, but voted for President Bush by a significant margin.

I read somewhere that the states with the biggest Democratic registration are Massachusetts (which votes Democratic) and Mississippi (which does not). And just so everyone knows, our strategy last year in Louisville was to use our registration advantage to get everyone to vote Democrat down the line, so we'd get Tony in. In fairness, that part of the plan should have worked, since every Democratic presidential candidate going back to Dukakis has carried the district, but I just don't think you can play the different-party card with an entrenched incumbent. We needed a real argument.

For Mr. Buchanan, it came down to what he said was the Christian principle that one person cannot judge another. "People try to separate sin, and you can't separate sin," he said. "They're the same, abortion and treating your neighbor like dirt. Anything that separates you from your God is sin. I can't say who's ungodly and who ain't."

Ding ding ding! Excommunicate this heretic pronto.

Nintendo World

I was hoping I could recruit a couple people into writing a snappy report of what it was like at Saturday's grand opening of Nintendo World in Rockefeller Center. Since my intrepid reporters failed both to come up with a report and to let me use more of our AIM conversations on the blog, I have to go with the fallback, some dipshit at Inside Pulse. Actually, I really like most of his report, but then he starts talking about Pokemon as if we should care and, well, my support starts to wane. Here's my favorite anecdote; it's a reference to how on the Nintendo DS handheld you can link up wirelessly with anyone nearby:


Speaking of PictoChat, that software actually came in handy over the course of the day. I'm serious! People waiting in lines often PictoChatted with other gamers, some of whom they couldn't even see due to the crowds. I joined in the fun, of course, using a false name and throwing random jokes and insults at other users. Nothing's more amusing then entering a PictoChat room loaded with Nintendophiles, sending a message in big letters that says "PSP RULZ!1!!!1!", then leaving. I could literally hear angry people across the line wondering who the jerk was that wrote that. God, I love my job sometimes.

Read the whole thing if you're interested in how it went. There are a fair number of pretty pictures. It's no Tokyo Games Show, though.

OK, one more nuclear option post

So I read an interesting blog post on how, contrary to popular opinion, the PR debate over "option" nomenclature is not limited to just "nuclear" and "constitutional." No, this guy here found no less than six attempts by the GOP to rename the nuclear option as something a little less frightening.

You can read the whole thing if you want, but I'd like to point out option #6:


6. Majority Rules Option — John Cornyn coined this clunker in April, but since it seems to run into the Dems’ argument about preserving Senate respect for minority rights, Cornyn didn’t convince any of his colleagues to use it. (It appeared in a CQ article, so there’s no link available.)

I know, I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl, but I just love it when John Cornyn fucks up. "I'm going to come up with another word for it; 'constitutional option' doesn't seem to fly." "Yeah! Me too!" Thanks for indulging.

The direct quote

Turns out this is what Eisenhower really said in that quote that's been going around. I got this from Snopes, who says it's true:


Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. There is a tiny splinter group, of course, that believes you can do these things. Among them are H. L. Hunt (you possibly know his background), a few other Texas oil millionaires, and an occasional politician or business man from other areas. Their number is negligible and they are stupid.

Just thought you'd like to know, Mr. Zakofsky.

E3 starts off on a bad note

Dear God:

Please let this be a joke.

UPDATE 5/16 (right after the update below): Apparently the site I linked to took down their image. It was the logo to the new Zelda game, and our first look at the title. Yes, the new title is The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. No word on whether you get to dress up and play make-believe.

UPDATE 5/16 (a little after 8 o'clock): Someone who doesn't like to be mentioned on the site suggests that the wolf (featured prominently in the preview videos, and the background of the painting posted below) is Zelda. Get it? Twilight Princess? She turns into a wolf at night? Oh jeez. I need another awesome new video, and stat.

Hilarious Line of the Day #2

I think this New York Times op-ed (soon to be paid-access only!) is on why it's so bad that an American bought a controlling interest in Manchester United, the New York Yankees of soccer. Eventually though it starts twisting into a history of English football, and we get this gem:


There was surely a tradition of jingoist xenophobia in English soccer, memorably expressed by Vincent Mulchrone, a columnist for The Daily Mail, on the morning England was to play West Germany in the 1966 World Cup. "West Germany may beat us at our national sport today, but that would be only fair," he wrote. "We beat them twice at theirs."

What, too soon?

NYT to start charging for online Op-Ed access

This problem won't be affecting me (thank you, Lexis-Nexis) but it looks like it's going to become harder to find each new iteration of how David Brooks thinks Democrats are so far out of touch with regular Americans. Starting September, the New York Times will be charging $49.95 annually for access to their Op-Ed columns. First the crossword puzzle, now this! Maureen Dowd's off my Christmas card list, that's for sure.

Here's a link, though apparently no one else knows anything more than I've already mentioned.

Hilarious Line of the Day #1

Follow this link here, read the headline, then read comment #13.

(The other comments are pretty funny too.)

This Stupid Koran Thing

OK, so here's the Bush administration spin: Newsweek erroneously reports that US forces at Guantanamo Bay have mutilated copies of the Koran, causing Afghanis, believing the Koran the word of God and all copies sacred, to riot and kill people. Here's a choice quote from Scott McClellan, whom I hope to punch in the face one day:


"The report has had serious consequences," he said. "People have lost their lives. The image of the United States abroad has been damaged."

This is a joke, right? The Bush administration is trying to avoid people losing their lives and damaging the reputation of the US abroad?

Snide comments aside, the Bush administration is doing something really nasty here. Here's the last line of the same article:


But the source later told the magazine he could not be certain he had seen an account of the Koran incident in the military report and that it might have been in other investigative documents or drafts, Newsweek said.

So wait, that's the issue? The whole argument here is over what report it appeared in? That's the issue? So no one's disputing that it actually happened, but Scott McClellan is still using this to blame Newsweek for people dying? Real classy, Scott.

Side note #1: Does anyone really think the actual incident, that of US forces flushing the Koran down the toilet to get detainees to talk, could possibly be false? After Abu Ghraib, and this weird ship-'em-out-to-Uzbeki-prisons story from a couple weeks back, and the fact that the Bush administration sees everything with divine moral clarity, I'd be shocked if they didn't. I am surprised heartland Muslims care so much though. It's not just a book?

Side note #2: You may know that Scott McClellan's brother, Mark McClellan, is head of the FDA, but did you also know that their mom, Carole Keeton Strayhorn, is the Texas state comptroller? She's thinking of running for governor in 2006 too.

Penny Arcade Is Funny Today

May 15, 2005

Wow

NYT says Episode III is better than Episode IV. Developing...

UPDATE 5/16: Roger Ebert gives Episode III 3½ stars out of 4.

Let's Review

Since the New York Times Magazine seems to have inexplicably devoted this week's entire issue to ockitectiuh, of all things, I thought it'd be appropriate to review my favorite NYT Magazine article, Ron Suskind's "Without A Doubt" from last October. (Thanks to truthout.org for still having it on their server.)

As you may recall, while the Kerry campaign was widely derided for not explaining what he would do differently than Bush, the president himself rarely interrupted his repetition of the words "September 11th" often enough to lay out a real second-term agenda. (Not that it stopped him from claiming a mandate to privatize Social Security.) Since I was expecting a massive Kerry comeback, a topic for another day, I didn't really consider what would happen should Bush be reelected.

Ron Suskind, fortunately, was on the ball. A liberal darling at least since he co-authored Paul O'Neill's Bush administration tell-all The Price of Loyalty, Suskind follows up with a devastating look at behind-the-scenes Republican Washington and their then-unannounced schedule for a second Bush administration. It's fascinating stuff, and I think you'll agree it's worth a second look.

Suskind frames his article as a look at Bush's moral certitude in his daily decision-making, but we all knew that already. The real insights come from his interviews with well-connected Republicans:


In the summer of 2002, after I had written an article in Esquire that the White House didn't like about Bush's former communications director, Karen Hughes, I had a meeting with a senior adviser to Bush. He expressed the White House's displeasure, and then he told me something that at the time I didn't fully comprehend - but which I now believe gets to the very heart of the Bush presidency.

The aide said that guys like me were "in what we call the reality-based community," which he defined as people who "believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality." I nodded and murmured something about enlightenment principles and empiricism. He cut me off. "That's not the way the world really works anymore," he continued. "We're an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you're studying that reality - judiciously, as you will - we'll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that's how things will sort out. We're history's actors . . . and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do."


I don't think this needs more explanation. I can't imagine this level of arrogance and condescension from people who both know better and should understand the terrible magnitude of their deeds. At least we got the mocking "I'm a member of the reality-based community" phrase out of it.

Our next entry comes from Bush's pollster, Mark McKinnon. I'm pretty sure he used to be a Democratic pollster who turned heel, but he's from Texas, so his word is good:


And for those who don't get it? That was explained to me in late 2002 by Mark McKinnon, a longtime senior media adviser to Bush, who now runs his own consulting firm and helps the president. He started by challenging me. "You think he's an idiot, don't you?" I said, no, I didn't. "No, you do, all of you do, up and down the West Coast, the East Coast, a few blocks in southern Manhattan called Wall Street. Let me clue you in. We don't care. You see, you're outnumbered 2 to 1 by folks in the big, wide middle of America, busy working people who don't read The New York Times or Washington Post or The L.A. Times. And you know what they like? They like the way he walks and the way he points, the way he exudes confidence. They have faith in him. And when you attack him for his malaprops, his jumbled syntax, it's good for us. Because you know what those folks don't like? They don't like you!" In this instance, the final "you," of course, meant the entire reality-based community.

Actually, I don't think he's that far off here, but again, the hatred is staggering. I only feel that kind of hatred for the candidates who beat my candidates every time I work on a campaign, never for wide-ranging groups. (As a side note, everyone who disparaged "Yankees" to me in Kentucky - it never happened in North Carolina - got a swift verbal kick to the nuts. Except when Northup's campaign manager turned out to be a Red Sox fan.) McKinnon's opinion is cruel, irresponsible and wrong.

Here's the trump card, the trompe l'oeil you could say:


"I'm going to be real positive, while I keep my foot on John Kerry's throat," George W. Bush said last month at a confidential luncheon a block away from the White House with a hundred or so of his most ardent, longtime supporters, the so-called R.N.C. Regents.
...
The Bush these supporters heard was a triumphal Bush, actively beginning to plan his second term. It is a second term, should it come to pass, that will alter American life in many ways, if predictions that Bush voiced at the luncheon come true. He said emphatically that he expects the Republicans will gain seats to expand their control of the House and the Senate.
...
He said that there will be an opportunity to appoint a Supreme Court justice shortly after his inauguration, and perhaps three more high-court vacancies during his second term.
...
Bush said: "I'm going to push nuclear energy, drilling in Alaska and clean coal. Some nuclear-fusion technologies are interesting." He mentions energy from "processing corn."
...
"I'm going to come out strong after my swearing in," Bush said, "with fundamental tax reform, tort reform, privatizing of Social Security." The victories he expects in November, he said, will give us "two years, at least, until the next midterm. We have to move quickly, because after that I'll be quacking like a duck."
...
The president, listing priorities for his second term, placed near the top of his agenda the expansion of federal support for faith-based institutions. The president talked at length about giving the initiative the full measure of his devotion and said that questions about separation of church and state were not an issue.

So there we have it. As of yet, Bush's only miss has been on the Supreme Court appointment soon after his inauguration, which hasn't happened. I suspect this comes from a combination of factors: Rehnquist, to whom Bush must have been referring, seems to have recovered some of his health after treatment for cancer, and it appears Republicans want to try the judicial nuclear option on a lower-court nominee first to give themselves a clear path to approving any Supreme Court nominee Bush wants to appoint. (My money is on John Ashcroft or Roy Moore.) ANWR turned out to be easier to implement than Bush had expected (it got into the budget, thanks to Chafee's deciding vote), and as we know Social Security privatization has been much tougher. Tax reform is apparently tanned, rested and ready for whenever Bush wants to drop Social Security and move on; apparently he'll propose either a flat sales tax or a sharply flatter income tax. Yes, that screws the poor.

The Bush campaign disavowed the blind quotes in Suskind's story, and attacked both Suskind and the Times for printing them. If I were either Ron Suskind or the New York Times, I would trumpet this article as a prime example of their reporting skills. The Bush presidency may be terrifying, but we can't say we weren't warned.

(Less relevant but equally great lines from the piece are excerpted if you click on "Continue reading..." below.)

More shining moments from the article:


The disdainful smirks and grimaces that many viewers were surprised to see in the first presidential debate are familiar expressions to those in the administration or in Congress who have simply asked the president to explain his positions.

...

In the Oval Office in December 2002, the president met with a few ranking senators and members of the House, both Republicans and Democrats. In those days, there were high hopes that the United States-sponsored "road map" for the Israelis and Palestinians would be a pathway to peace, and the discussion that wintry day was, in part, about countries providing peacekeeping forces in the region. The problem, everyone agreed, was that a number of European countries, like France and Germany, had armies that were not trusted by either the Israelis or Palestinians. One congressman - the Hungarian-born Tom Lantos, a Democrat from California and the only Holocaust survivor in Congress - mentioned that the Scandinavian countries were viewed more positively. Lantos went on to describe for the president how the Swedish Army might be an ideal candidate to anchor a small peacekeeping force on the West Bank and the Gaza Strip. Sweden has a well-trained force of about 25,000. The president looked at him appraisingly, several people in the room recall.

"I don't know why you're talking about Sweden," Bush said. "They're the neutral one. They don't have an army."

Lantos paused, a little shocked, and offered a gentlemanly reply: "Mr. President, you may have thought that I said Switzerland. They're the ones that are historically neutral, without an army." Then Lantos mentioned, in a gracious aside, that the Swiss do have a tough national guard to protect the country in the event of invasion.

Bush held to his view. "No, no, it's Sweden that has no army."

The room went silent, until someone changed the subject.

...

Moments after the ceremony, Bush saw Wallis. He bounded over and grabbed the cheeks of his face, one in each hand, and squeezed. "Jim, how ya doin', how ya doin'!" he exclaimed. Wallis was taken aback. Bush excitedly said that his massage therapist had given him Wallis's book, "Faith Works." His joy at seeing Wallis, as Wallis and others remember it, was palpable - a president, wrestling with faith and its role at a time of peril, seeing that rare bird: an independent counselor. Wallis recalls telling Bush he was doing fine, "'but in the State of the Union address a few days before, you said that unless we devote all our energies, our focus, our resources on this war on terrorism, we're going to lose.' I said, 'Mr. President, if we don't devote our energy, our focus and our time on also overcoming global poverty and desperation, we will lose not only the war on poverty, but we'll lose the war on terrorism."'

Bush replied that that was why America needed the leadership of Wallis and other members of the clergy.

"No, Mr. President," Wallis says he told Bush, "We need your leadership on this question, and all of us will then commit to support you. Unless we drain the swamp of injustice in which the mosquitoes of terrorism breed, we'll never defeat the threat of terrorism."

Bush looked quizzically at the minister, Wallis recalls. They never spoke again after that.

Paul Shirley is Awesome

Are any of your friends NBA players? Me either. Fortunately we've got the next best thing: Kansas native, Iowa State engineering grad and Phoenix Suns benchwarmer Paul Shirley is working on his second online journal of what it's like to be an NBA player. Even besides the opportunity to get an inside voice on the Suns for what may be a championship year (it's a fun game to read newspaper articles on the Suns' recently named league MVP, Steve Nash, and see how long it takes for them to mention he's Canadian), Paul Shirley is a flat-out interesting guy with a sarcastic and cynical sense of humor.

It took me several weeks of prodding from my friends to actually go and read Shirley's blog. I'll assume as a result that it would take descriptive skills beyond my pay grade to convince you. How about, then, I just put up the links, and you can see for yourself:

Paul Shirley's Suns road trip journal from March

Paul's current playoff journal, in progress

You owe it to yourself: read his first road trip journal, just for a couple minutes, and see if you like it. It worked when you tried Arrested Development, didn't it?

Nintendo E3 buzz

Oh my god:

I think I just lost use of most of my bodily functions. Thanks to planetgamecube.com for coming up with this one.

Does anyone remember what day E3 starts?

World League of American Baseball

So it turns out former Rangers and Mets manager Bobby Valentine is managing in Japan these days, claiming unparalleled wisdom as to the future of the game. Namely, he thinks it's time to move on the long-proposed true World Series. Congrats to the New York Post for tracking him down:


"There are going to be bigger and better things in baseball and I am going to be involved in it," Valentine said by phone. "We have to open eyes and minds and have vision. No one on this side of the pond or on that side of the pond has the vision or the desire to do what should be done. They are too lost in today.

"There should be a division of major league baseball in Asia with major league franchises and with world players, not just Asian players. This way you would have a common world draft. The infrastructure is already here. The stadiums, the TVs, the fans."


First off, the theory is that next year's spring-training Baseball World Cup (yes, they're doing serious competition about a week after pitchers start throwing, and yes, that will lead to crappy play and injuries) will provide the impetus to do some form of international major-league baseball. Due to time differences, it's not feasible for the Hong Kong Capitalists to play at home one day and then hop on over to visit the Mets the next.

So there are logistical hurdles to bringing Asia into the major-league fold, but that hasn't stopped anyone from tossing out solutions. My personal favorite is to include Asian teams in player contracts (i.e. include them in drafts, allow them to trade with North American teams, let them sign free agents, etc.), and have the North American champion play the Asian champ in some form of World Series. Other suggestions include an Asian division in each league to go along with East, Central and West, and give each team one long intercontinental road trip (air trip?) per year.

Still, there are a lot of questions as to whether Asian baseball would sustain a long-term business model. There's a flourishing Japanese major league that's increasingly sending over MLB stars. (Note that Japanese import Ichiro Suzuki last year broke the 80-year record for hits in a season.) Now let's see, Korea's also producing its share of ballplayers too, but it's unclear that any other Asian country would really want a major-league team. While that's not a huge problem (what do we care if all the teams are in Japan or Seoul, especially just to start), it raises the other big issue of Asian baseball viability. These Japanese teams may be able to compete with each other, but how many of them are going to be able to afford the mega-contracts that the Yankees, Angels and Red Sox can offer? And let's not forget the cultural issue: a lot of these guys, especially the American ballplayers, will demand extra money to sign with the Yomiuri Giants. Existing Asian teams may be able to afford this kind of talent, but with Bobby Valentine's top players being fellow Mets castoffs, frankly I doubt it.

I hope international baseball works: it's my favorite sport by a longshot and I want to see it flourish, especially if my suspicions are correct that its long-term American viability is in question too. So while I don't see a path yet for making this work, I hope there is one. It's good to see baseball guys like Bobby Valentine actively looking for a way to make it work.

Side note: Once, when Bobby Valentine was Mets manager, he got thrown out of the game. Fortunately, the Mets then turned to the dugout leadership of a guy looking suspiciously like Bobby Valentine in sunglasses and a fake mustache. Unfortunately, the bastard umps threw this new skipper out of the game too, for reasons undetermined.

Approaching the Filibuster Endgame

Interesting nuclear-option news today. As you may know, the latest rumor is that Bill Frist is going to try to use the nuclear option to end judicial filibusters this week, maybe as early as Wednesday. DailyKos and other liberal blogs claim that Frist just doesn't have the votes (he needs a simple majority of 51, or I guess 50 with Cheney), but I'm still not convinced. Fortunately, today the Kansas City Star reports that Pat Roberts, the normally lockstep GOP senator from Kansas, is wavering pretty hard on the nuclear option himself. Jonathan Singer has a fine analysis of who's where on the issue if you're curious as to how things stand.

As a side note, though, while I believe the Republicans intend only to end filibusters specifically on judicial nominees, it's not necessarily the worst thing in the world if the Senate were no longer allowed to filibuster. At least as EJ Dionne claimed a couple months ago:


Conservatives say that liberals are a strange bunch to be defending the filibuster -- and the conservatives have a point. Liberals fought the filibuster when it was used by the Senate's Southern segregationist minority to stall civil rights bills. I'll acknowledge that when Republicans used the filibuster to obstruct health care reform and other pieces of progressive legislation in the first years of President Bill Clinton's term, I was tempted to support changes in the filibuster rules.

Without the filibuster around to protect archiac conservatives, America might actually have become a lot more progressive. Who knows?

May 14, 2005

A More Intelligent Design

Will Saletan was my favorite political writer for a long time, mostly because he liked Edwards before anyone else*, but also because he had a feel for politics that struck me as smart (mostly because it seemed so close to mine, and his was more attentive). He's focusing now almost exclusively on social-conservative issues and the intersection of science and ethics, so I don't care as much and now Matt Bai of the New York Times Magazine is my favorite political writer. But Will Saletan still knows how to write.

He showed his talent again this week with an insightful look at the intelligent-design debate going on in Kansas. He makes two points that I found instructive. First, us liberal elitists should resist the urge to dismiss intelligent design as more wacko bullcrap from the crazies:


Liberals, editorialists, and biologists wonder aloud how people can refuse to see evolution when it's staring them in the face. Maybe they should ask themselves. It's the creationists in Kansas who are evolving. And it's the evolutionists who can't see it.

To understand the fight in Kansas, you have to study what evolutionists accuse creationists of neglecting: the historical record. In the Scopes trial, creationists defended a ban on the teaching of evolution. That was the early, authoritarian stage of creationism—the equivalent of Australopithecus, the earliest hominid. Gradually, evolution gained the upper hand. In 1987, the Supreme Court ruled that states couldn't even require equal treatment of evolution and creationism. By 1999, creationists were asking the Kansas board not to rule out their beliefs entirely. This was creationism's more advanced Homo erectus phase: pluralism.


Now, says Saletan, they've evolved their argument to homo sapiens:

The new challenger, ID, differs fundamentally from fundamentalism. Like its creationist forebears, ID is theistic. But unlike them, it abandons Biblical literalism, embraces open-minded inquiry, and accepts falsification, not authority, as the ultimate test. These concessions, sincere or not, define a new species of creationism—Homo sapiens—that fatally undermines its ancestors. Creationists aren't threatening us. They're becoming us.

So that's a frightening prospect: how can defenders of science deal with having the burden of proof shifted upon us? How can you prove there was not an intelligent hand guiding the creation of life? So have creationists backed us into a corner? Not so, says Saletan. Now that creationists have made these concessions, they can't really win:

Essentially, ID proponents are gambling that they can concede evolutionist earth science without conceding evolutionist life science. But they can't. They already acknowledge microevolution—mutation and natural selection within a species. Once you accept conventional fossil dating and four billion years of life, the sequential kinship of species loses its implausibility. You can't fall back on the Bible; you've already admitted it can't always be taken literally. All you're left with is an assortment of gaps in evolutionary theory—how did DNA emerge, what happened between this and that fossil—and the vague default assumption that an "intelligence" might fill in those gaps. Calvert and Harris call this assumption a big tent. But guess what happens to a tent without poles.

Saletan concludes by saying that the liberal and science communities should consider taking creationists up on their challenge: instead of dismissing intelligent design out of hand, let's put it up to the rigors of science, like ID supporters suggest. If we give everyone a fair chance to look at the two theories side by side, people will see ID for what it is: an attempt to explain away scientific questions by waving our arms and saying "magic." If we're going to preach the scientific method, let's have a little faith in it.

* Examples of Saletan's political genius and Edwards support include his
admiration of the Edwards tax plan and his plea for an Edwards surge.

Chappelle's Fucked

Yes, I plan on making three posts a week about Dave Chappelle for the rest of my life. Actually, I might not have to, as he's doing his part to drop out of public view or interest by himself. Drudge has an exclusive on an upcoming Time exclusive:


Dave Chappelle Found! Talks Exclusively with TIME Magazine in South Africa

"I figured, Let me just cut myself off from everybody, take a minute and pull a Flintstone-stop a speeding car by using my feet as the brakes. I am surprised at what I would do for $50 million. I am surprised at what people around me would do for me to have $50 million," Dave Chappelle tells TIME's Christopher John Farley in an exclusive interview.

CHAPPELLE tells TIME he's not in mental hospital or drug rehab, debunking earlier reports in ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY and elsewhere.


Yeah, looks good, but isn't. This is Chappelle's challenge-Ticketmaster or weird-new-song moment: he'll recover from this fine, and have a successful third season of Chappelle's Show whenever he gets around to it. But this breaks his magic, and in the future fans, producers and fellow talent will know he's a guy liable to go crazy and leave the continent at any time. People can recover from this kind of stuff, but in his case, I doubt it. Just a hunch.

Novak Dimes Out the GOP Message Matrix

Noted shithead Robert Novak wrote another gem of a column today. In fairness, I like his columns, since he has a deal with himself to always write at least one bit of previously unreported news. Sure, he may have outed a CIA agent for no particular reason (no, to serve as an outlet of Karl Rove's frustrations is not a particular reason), but reading his column usually leaves me knowing more about American politics than I did when I started. So I recommend reading it.

That's not to say what you learn makes you confident in the fate of our republic. Besides his ridiculous headline, which perpetuates the unhelpful and incorrect notion that predicting presidential nominees more than two weeks before Iowa is either useful or possible, he makes two comments that I found instructive. Here's the first:


Lott was trying to show that every effort had been made to negotiate a settlement before Republicans attempted to use the ''nuclear option'' (a phrase coined by Lott) to force a majority vote on judicial confirmations.

(This note was on the possible return of Trent Lott to Republican leadership, by the way.) Novak takes an interesting political step here. As Josh Mitchell has been noting on talkingpointsmemo.com, the notoriously connected Republican message machine has been doing its darnedest to convince reporters, with some success, that they only want to try the "constitutional option" to approve Bush's judicial appointees with a simple majority vote, and it's the Democrats who have come up with the "nuclear option" to shut down the Senate if/when this happens. I have to admit, I'm surprised a conservative columnist like Novak (don't forget, he's "from the right" on Crossfire) would throw the GOP message machine under the bus. Now Democrats have good-enough-for-politics proof that "nuclear option" refers to the Repbulican plan to abandon judicial filibusters: a Republican admitted it!

Incredibly, Novak dings the Republican message machine again later in his column:


Gray was White House counsel in the first George Bush administration and has led citizens' efforts for the confirmation of George W. Bush's judicial nominations.

(C. Boyden Gray is about to be named US ambassador to the EU.) Novak's comment here is striking, because it reveals what Democratic activists have known for some time: most grassroots conservative organizations are created, directed, coordinated and funded right out of Washington, DC. Again, this isn't proof, but the next time some group you've never heard of starts running ads advocating a conservative position as if it'll help all of us in the heartland, don't confuse it for actual broadbased support.

And why is Novak admitting all this?

May 13, 2005

Good news for Arrested Development

The first time I watched Arrested Development was a night a year or two ago where, for reasons undisclosed, I had nothing to do but watch TV. After the Simpsons, I decided to watch the next show until it bored me and I changed the channel. I can't say I watch Arrested Development regularly, but it has never, ever bored me. That's why I'm happy to say, mostly for bigger fans than me out there, that it appears Arrested Development is being renewed. I'll spare you the claptrap from this hideous E! Online gossip piece, and just get you the details:


Though they're still dotting I's and crossing T's on the final documents, I'm told Fox network and 20th Century Fox studio are "99.9 percent of the way there" to reaching an agreement on the new season. According to these highly placed sources, it looks very likely that Arrested Development will be coming back not only for a full season of 22 episodes but actually two full seasons of 22 episodes. How freaking fantastic is that?

I am well aware this sounds far-fetched, as my friends at Defamer have pointed out. But I'm told the reason Fox network wants to go with 44 episodes instead of 22 is that by ordering bulk, the licensing fee will be cheaper.


So congratulations all around.

Thomas Friedman References Joe DiMaggio in the Headline, But Not in the Column

I'm afraid to say my opinion of Thomas Friedman's columns has been declining as late; usually I find him more condescending than enlightening. (I have read a hell of a lot of Thomas Friedman columns, so maybe I just know his material already. On the other hand, his Wednesday column on how to solve the North Korean and Iranian nuclear problems in one fell swoop was pretty bad.) Still, every so often Friedman can use his status as the only columnist on Earth who still likes reporting to come up with an underreported gem. Here's the conclusion of his column today:


America today reminds me of our last Olympic basketball team - that lackadaisical group that brought home the bronze medal. We think that all we need to do is show up and everyone else will fold - because, after all, we're just competing with ourselves.

And we think we don't need to get focused and play together like a team, with Democrats and Republicans actually working together. Well, on the basketball court - and in a flat world, where everyone now has access to all the same coaching techniques, training methods and scouting reports - a more focused, motivated team always beats a collection of more talented but complacent individuals.

But that's just the theme, and a mediocre analogy. If you read the whole thing, and go through his examples, one by one, of the ways in which America is falling behind China, India, Russia, Eastern Europe and who knows what else, I suspect you'll end up as concerned as I am. Personally, it's no longer out of the question for me that America loses its superpower status sooner than later.

But anyway, I blame Tom DeLay. Who do you think's gonna win Idol?

See, now this is why I read Roger Ebert

I'm never going to see half the movies this guy reviews, but every so often you get a little gem that makes it all worth it. My personal favorite Ebertism is when he spends too much time talking about a peripheral (or unrelated) topic, because he just doesn't like the movie that much. The latest example is from his review of Mondovino, a movie apparently intended to convince us that Big Wine is making all wine across the world taste the same. A more depressing Sideways? Anyway, this is what he writes:


He makes this argument in a film that is too long and needlessly mannered. There is no particular reason for a restless hand-held camera in a documentary about wine. If we are watching a documentary about cockfighting or the flight of the bumblebee, we can see the logic of a jumpy camera, but vineyards don't move around much and are easy to keep in frame. I am more permissive about Nossiter's other camera strategy, which is to interrupt a shot whenever a dog comes into view, in order to focus on the dog. This I understand. Whenever a dog appears at a social occasion, I immediately interrupt my conversation to greet the dog, and often find myself turning back to its owner with regret.

If I'm the only one who thinks that's funny, that's fine by me.

Oh, I Never Would Have Guessed!

We talk about other things, I promise:


ThisOneKidMongo: hm, i'm going to estimate two weeks before edge and lita are together on screen
terrymcmahon312: yeah really
terrymcmahon312: then in six months they'll bring back matt hardy for a disappointing smark feud
ThisOneKidMongo: i can't wait!

Thank you Inside Pulse (yes, this blog is going to be a series of me admitting I read things):


It seems as the whole Lita/Edge/Matt Hardy love triangle, may make a turn to an actual on air storyline. With Edge and Kane (Lita's on air husband) in the main event on Monday's edition of Raw, it seems as Lita may get involved with Edge in an on air relationship.

...

There are also some reports that Vince McMahon may be interested in bringing Matt Hardy back, to make this an on air storyline. The chants in arena after arena are reportedly getting to him, and he is starting to realize that he made a mistake.

...

Lita is not in a relationship with either Matt or Edge, but is still on speaking terms with both of them. Edge, who originally saw all this has heel heat, has now changed his feelings on this, and now is very regretful about what has happened. Matt is still not talking to Edge.

Sure it's disappointing that I can now predict WWE's crappy storyline ideas, but if I let disappointment in WWE bring me down, I would have thrown myself off the top of a steel cage long ago. In case you can't guess, Lita and Matt Hardy were dating, and then Edge and Lita knocked boots, and since Edge and Lita are top talent (Matt Hardy should be, but isn't), Matt got fired. (I mean this all in real life, incidentally, not storylines.) The "chants" referred to above are "YOU SCREWED MATT" chants from the so-called ign'int fans every time Lita or Edge enters the ring. Completely ridiculous. Matt Hardy is a good wrestler with a great character, and he should be pushed more than any of the people fucking around with him. And that includes Vince McMahon.

May 12, 2005

Okay, whoops

I think you already knew most of my posts were inoperative, but here's proof: according to Gawker, which I admit I read, Dave Chappelle has been in a mental institution since April. Get well soon, bitch!

May 11, 2005

Book Report: Joe DiMaggio: The Hero's Life

I was thinking of using the blog as an opportunity to review the books I read when I finish them. Since the blog is mostly an excuse to practice my writing anyway, I figure I can also review books I've finished before this line of demarcation. which I guess would be right now.

Anyway, I just wrapped up Richard Ben Cramer's Joe DiMaggio: The Hero's Life. (By the way, does anyone else ever try linking to Amazon without any idea how much of that book-long URL is necessary? I feel like I'm giving you my credit card number.) Now, I know it's heresy as a Sox fan to be reading this stuff, but I have several good reasons. First, as you may have heard, the Boston Red Sox are the current world champions, after the Red Sox won the World Series last year. So now that my favorite team just won the World Series, we can afford a little grace and dignity and not revile the Yankees at every turn. (No feeling bad for Giambi when he gets shunted down to Columbus though.) Second, the author, Richard Ben Cramer, wrote one of my favorite books, What It Takes, his saga of the 1988 presidential primaries, and six of the men who put themselves up on the stage. One of the great things about Cramer's writing is that he can seamlessly mix in the vernacular of his topic, from the 1920s San Francisco playground to the Rat Pack of the 50s. Usually this means using a lot of the word "pal," but the effect is nice. You could argue that maybe I should have noticed this when it was Dick Gephardt in an Iowa campaign office or Mike Dukakis going door-to-door in Brookline, but then again it's my blog. Final note on Cramer: He also wrote a book on Ted Williams, cut him some slack.

The first thing that struck me about DiMaggio was the hero worship that took over this guy's life. If you look at his stats, they're just not as good as someone like Ruth, or Williams, or even his successor Mickey Mantle. But he's apparently one of the most revered players in baseball history; if Cramer is correct then DiMaggio won several "Greatest Living Player" votes, decades after he retired. There seem to be a lot of reasons for this; he was clearly intended as Ruth's successor on the Yankees, he was apparently the first player to be fantastic at all five tools (running, throwing, fielding, hitting, and hitting for power), and he was one of the country's first Italian stars when there weren't a lot of minority role models. Throw in his Depression-era playing years, his apparent "grace" on the field (mentioned by Cramer all the time, I have no idea what that is) and, of course, following up his major-league career by marrying Marilyn Monroe, and this is a successful guy. (Incidentally, he won nine World Series in his thirteen major-league seasons, a record I don't see being broken for a while.) But with all that success came with some stringent requirements: he was, whether he liked it or not, a hero. (I'm pretty sure he did; read on.) Joe DiMaggio built up a public persona of a man who played ball the way he lived life: with quiet, strong grace. I mean, his autobiography was called Lucky to Be a Yankee. And it's funny - I'd point out how cringe-worthy that title sounds today, but I saw ESPN's coverage of last year's Home Run Derby last week, and who should be sitting in the stands, enthralled by the proceedings, but certified superstar and legend Curt Schilling. Now, I'm sure Schilling had at least a mild interest in who won the Home Run Derby, but sitting with the fans and watching every pitch fits in nicely with Schilling's clear desire to promote the sport, himself, and his own legend. Maybe the hero persona isn't gone from baseball entirely. (And, lest you complain: these guys won!)

DiMaggio's reaction to the hero lifestyle is itself a fascinating topic. You ever hear of a professional athlete signing an autograph for a kid, or hanging out with a regular guy just because he was a good friend, and you think, "wow, he could have charged anything for it?" Joe charged for it. I have been trying to understand his mindset, and here's the best I can come up with: he hated the idea of anyone making a buck off his life, his winning-is-everything mentality made him want to earn as much money as he possibly could (certainly more than any other retired ballplayer), and he thought everyone was out to take advantage of him. Here are a few exciting tales from the book:

- Guy who owns the NYC restaurant he used to go to listens to Joe lament Marilyn leaving him. Guy says, "ahh, what are you gonna do with any whore," by which time Joe is already out the door, desperate apologies or no. Never mind that this guy knew Joe for 20 years, listened to Joe, closed the restaurant for Joe, drove Joe around the city, kept his secrets, started a fund for Joe that went into the millions, and yet never asked for anything, or even gave Joe a bill. DiMaggio never spoke to him again.

- Small memorabilia company sets up a deal with a long-retired DiMaggio to sell autographed balls and pictures. They buy too many, they flood the market, and soon the money stops coming in. They go to Joe and ask if he'd let them backload some of the money coming to him, so they can keep the company afloat and get it to him later. Joe says no, and while looking through the contract to prove his case, he realizes that the contract gives these guys the rights to DiMaggio-signed balls and pictures - but it doesn't say anything about anyone else! So with this company about to go under from flooding the market with product, out comes Joe DiMaggio-signed baseball bats, yours for only $3,995.

- After the 1989 San Francisco earthquake, firefighters went into every house to make sure the gas and stove were off. Joe returned to his house, the only one on the block not damaged, and flew into a rage upon discovering the firefighters had broken a window to unlock the back door. He also swore they had taken half a dozen balls from his garage (he only had a few hundred dozen!), so his friend accompanying him asked him about the stack of shirts he had in the garage, even asking for one. This is thin ice for a DiMaggio friend: you call yourself your friend, and you drive him around, get him stuff, and never ask for anything. DiMaggio got all those shirts from golf tournaments; they gave you a package, with a shirt, some golf clubs and other assorted stuff that went straight to Joe's garage. That didn't stop him, of course, from telling upcoming tournaments that he was bringing a friend who needed a package too, in the same size. So, the shirts piled up in garage. And when the friend asked for one, Joe said no.

I've certainly never seen someone leverage everything in their life so effectively as Joe DiMaggio. It's certainly his right. Still, what an asshole.

May 10, 2005

Kind of Crap

Looks like noted Brooklynite Galvin Chow's put his legendary Kind of Crap website back up. If you're not familiar, it's his web journal (do NOT say blog) from his two years teaching English to snot-nosed Japanese kids. If you are familiar (maybe a message board alum? dipshit?), then why isn't Galvin updating it?

Send him an email, and let him know what you think!

UPDATE 5/13: OK, Galvin started bitching that he's getting more spam because I posted his email address, so I changed the address to a series of inside jokes. Fortunately, I've since published his AIM name, so contact him that way.

Harry Reid Is My Frickin' Hero

You may be able to guess what I think about Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid, since it's the same opinion as a lot of Democratic activists: he's great. He's aggressive in standing up for Democratic values, and he's had a Theo Epstein-level boldness with some of his strategic moves. Here's one story from earlier this year: after the Republicans beat Tom Daschle in South Dakota, in no small part by calling him an obstructionist with no vision of his own, they released a 200-page document on how Reid himself was just as bad an obstructionist as Daschle. So did Reid retreat to the bunker, to try to plan an appropriate response? No way - he immediately said that kind of attack had no place in politics, and at his meeting the next day with Bush, he made the president disavow his own party's tactics. Not bad. So Harry Reid is a real man.

He showed off his cajones again today by calling Frist out on the nuclear option to abandon judicial filibusters in the Senate. Via Kos, I found out Reid has just put out a statement, with a message for Frist: put up or shut up.


I still consider this confrontation entirely unnecessary and irresponsible. The White House manufactured this crisis. Since Bush took office, the Senate confirmed 208 of his judicial nominations and turned back only 10, a 95% confirmation rate. Instead of accepting that success and avoiding further divisiveness and partisanship in Washington, the President chose to pick fights instead of judges by resubmitting the names of the rejected nominees.

This fight is not about seven radical nominees; it's about clearing the way for a Supreme Court nominee who only needs 51 votes, instead of 60 votes. They want a Clarence Thomas, not a Sandra Day O'Connor or Anthony Kennedy or David Souter. George Bush wants to turn the Senate into a second House of Representatives, a rubberstamp for his right wing agenda and radical judges. That's not how America works.

I believe there are two options for avoiding the nuclear showdown, which so many of us believe is bad for the Senate, and bad for America.

But I want to be clear: we are prepared for a vote on the nuclear option. Democrats will join responsible Republicans in a vote to uphold the constitutional principle of checks and balances.

...

Either of these options offers a path away from the precipice of the nuclear option. But if neither of these options is acceptable to you, let's vote.

As Kos mentions, the two alternatives Reid proposes are a previously issued proposal that the Democrats will let most of these judges slide in exchange for keeping the filibuster, or a regular vote on changing Senate rules. (The latter requires a two-thirds vote, the GOP is skirting the rules to do it with a simple majority.)

But you gotta love a guy who's not afraid to call a bluff. Time for Bill Frist to show his hand.


(And as an addendum, former Senate Democratic Leader George Mitchell lays out a history of the judicial filibuster in today's New York Times. Yes, the Republicans used it, and apparently quite a lot.)

May 9, 2005

The Griffey/Pearl Jam connection

I remarked last night that Pearl Jam is the Ken Griffey Jr. of rock music. For the uninitiated: Griffey had about ten amazing years, got injured, got injured again, kept getting injured, and hasn't had a really great year since back when we assumed the economy would never stop growing. Pearl Jam had three awesome albums, then tried and failed to break the backs of Ticketmaster, then made their next single a duet with some guy doing Pakistani music, and since then, their albums have been nowhere near as good as their first few. So with both these acts here, everyone still kind of hopes they'll be their old selves again, but we don't really expect it.

So. Greatest analogy ever?

Another Win for Spitzer

New York Attorney General Eliot Spitzer is good. Real good. In case anyone couldn't tell from his poll numbers, showing him winning the governor's seat by 20 points whether Pataki runs or not, the guy just keeps hitting the right notes every time he's on stage:

First and foremost, he's best known for turning the state AG's office into an aggressive prosecutor of Wall Street crime and shenanigans. Underrated tactic: going after the criminally rich is extraordinarily popular, difficult to criticize, and the right thing to do. To continue shaping his honest, reformist persona, Spitzer's refusing to take donations from any employee of a company currently under investigation by the AG's office. Already that shows a politician who knows his stuff.

Second, he's embracing the blog community. He went up with his campaign website early, in late December 2004, to appeal to online Democratic activists still nursing wounds from the previous month's lamentable events. Plus his own blog is on the front page of his website. Seriously, check it out: name, grinning photo, blog entries. Not a bad deal. I only hope he changes his policy of updating his page less frequently than I do.

So what kind of move can help his campaign even more? That's right: Eliot Spitzer just saved the Mets. OK, that's not true, but he got negotiations together to get the Mets back on TV. Time Warner Cable and Cablevision had a showdown this preseason as to whether Time Warner customers could watch Mets games on Fox Sports and MSG. It looked like the season would go ahead without a deal, leaving Mets fans across the state with no way to watch the games, and then - nothing. For almost a month and a half, Mets fans from Matt to Harrison to Mooney have been telling me how awful it is to miss all these hilarious 8-run, 3 2/3-inning appearances by Tom Glavine. Now Eliot Spitzer has helped broker a deal between the warring factions, and Mets games are back on the air.

So thank you, Eliot Spitzer. Thank you for making the whining stop.

May 8, 2005

Let Chappelle be Chappelle

Newsweek's got an interesting look online at the repeated delays in the next season of Chappelle's Show. From what I gather, it looks like it's nothing too disconcerting: Chappelle's overnight transition from cult hero to $50 million megastar has him a little rattled, and then Comedy Central's not thrilled that he wants to get even more extreme with his race-based humor.

So I'm not that concerned; the new material mentioned in the article sounds hilarious and, at the very least, up to Chappelle's already sterling standards. But the issue with the network has me a little piqued. Sure, the debate between the network hacks and the talent over crossing these imaginary taboos is as old as TV itself (and probably older), but that's what's special about Dave Chappelle. Every time I watch the show, I'm just stunned: I should be grossly offended, but I'm not. Remember the racial draft? Or the one where he brought in John Mayer to show that white people actually can dance? How about the one where Eddie Murphy's brother Charlie challenged Prince and his friends to a game of midnight basketball, and Prince showed up in purple from head to toe, and still beat the shit out of them? (OK, that last one wasn't about race, but man was that funny.)

So let me put it this way: If Dave Chappelle's going to cross the line, he would have done it twenty times already. Let the guy play.

I'm Not Sure You Understand Blogs

In a New York Times op-ed today, Adam Cohen drops into the world of blog-journalism, criticizing bloggers for not holding themselves to the same journalistic standards for which they routinely excoriate reporters for breaking. You can probably guess how the whole thing reads, but here's one choice remark:


Richard Hofstadter noted in "The Age of Reform" that American reformers had been prone to an "enormous amount of self-accusation." Throughout history, reform movements have ostentatiously held themselves to higher standards than the institutions they attacked.
...
Many bloggers who criticize the MSM's ethics, however, are in the anomalous position of holding themselves to lower standards, or no standards at all.


(MSM stands for "mainstream media." This is your final warning.)

But here's what our friend Mr. Cohen misses in his essay: blogging ain't journalism. The mantra of blogging, political or otherwise, is "call it as you see it." Or, to continue with Mr. Cohen's newspaper motif, blogs are not news reports. They're op-eds. Until recently, the opportunity to write down a critique of the news of the day, and to expect anyone to read it, was limited to a very select group of people, i.e. the newspaper columnists. Now, anyone can have their own newspaper columns. While most of these new columnists still can't expect anyone to read them, a lot of them can.

This advent of blogs, and the resultant stream of populist opinion-makers, means great things for journalism. First, blogs have dramatically expanded the source material for column-writing, allowing people to read and write about fascinating topics that would be otherwise ignored. (I'm reminded of the "Here's what I saw at the DNC's southern meeting" blogs from last winter.) Even better, writing criticisms without talking to everyone involved beforehand, an approach Mr. Cohen seems to deplore, allows bloggers to get the hell away from the Washington timidity that's crippling our country. So, horror of horrors, I suspect our friend Adam Cohen will survive having to share the floor with thousands of opinion-makers - even if they're sometimes wrong. Just like him.

May 7, 2005

Democrats and real life

We all know Democrats supposedly have a connection gap going on between the party leadership and the regular American voters. My last post disputed the extent of the problem, but at least among Washington cognoscenti, the Democratic Party needs to figure out how to express their inner Joe Schmo more effectively in public.

This great post has some ideas, from a standup comic. As he says, he's got to win over swing audiences every night. I certainly don't agree with him on everything, but I do think John Kerry might have gotten more serious consideration from a lot of folks if he could have said "ain't" naturally.

And thinking about professions that could teach the Democrats a little something gave me an idea: what about punk rockers? They're wicked tough, and wicked liberal. Sure, some of them are radical, skinny chumps who dress weird, but it's hard not to appreciate the political boldness of Bad Religion and their latest album, The Empire Strikes First. (Incidentally, I've only heard the title track, but it really, really rocks.)

May 3, 2005

We All Know Regular People Vote Republican

You've probably heard the story running through the punditocracy these days: working-class voters are voting Republican now, ever since those sum'bitch Democrats insist on mandatory gay marriage and abortion. Authentic, everyday folks, after all, have long gone Republican because the GOP is the only party that cares about the values of real people and winning the war on terror.

And like most conventional wisdom in politics, it's not true, or even close. MyDD has color maps of who each state voted for in the last election - first for voters making under $50,000, and then for voters making over $100,000. Turns out that rancher in Texas is a lot more popular with the white-tie crowd than we thought. Check out the link - and don't let anyone twist the facts on this again.